As we age, the way we interact with others can have a big impact on our relationships and overall happiness. Nobody wants to be that person who unintentionally pushes people away or brings down the mood. Instead, most of us strive to be someone others enjoy being around—someone who radiates positivity and leaves a lasting impression.
But here’s the thing: staying joyful and approachable often means letting go of certain habits that don’t serve us (or those around us).
In this article, we’ll explore seven behaviors that can drain your joy and make it harder to connect with others.
Let’s get started.
1) Complaining
As we get older, it’s easy to fall into the trap of complaining. The weather, the neighbors, the state of the world – you name it.
But here’s the thing. Complaining doesn’t make us happier. If anything, it drags us – and those around us – down.
It’s not that you should ignore the problems in your life. But rather than dwelling on them, try to find solutions. Or, if there’s nothing you can do about it, accept it and move on.
Complaining is a habit, and like all habits, it can be hard to break. But once you do, you’ll start to notice a shift in your mindset – and so will the people around you.
2) Being judgmental
I’ll be the first to admit it – I’ve had my moments of being judgmental. It’s something we all do from time to time. But as I’ve gotten older, I’ve realized just how damaging it can be.
I clearly remember a day when I was chatting with a friend over a cup of coffee. She was telling me about a decision she’d made, and without thinking, I blurted out my opinion. Her face fell, and the conversation took a turn for the worse.
That’s when it hit me – my judgment wasn’t helping anyone, least of all me. It was creating tension in my relationships and making me less joyful to be around.
So, I’ve been working on being less judgmental. Instead of jumping to conclusions or offering unsolicited advice, I try to listen and understand where the other person is coming from.
It’s not always easy, but it’s made a big difference in my life – and in my relationships. By becoming less judgmental, we become more accepting and open-hearted. And that can make us more joyful to be around as we age.
3) Holding grudges
Holding grudges is not just detrimental for your social life, but also for your health. Research has shown that holding onto anger and resentment can increase stress, raise blood pressure, and contribute to mental health issues such as depression and anxiety.
That’s right. Your grudge isn’t just making you less pleasant to be around – it’s impacting your well-being too.
Learning to forgive and let go doesn’t mean forgetting what happened or allowing people to walk all over you. It simply means choosing not to let the past control your present.
4) Resisting change
Change is an inevitable part of life. As the saying goes, the only constant in life is change. However, as we age, many of us have a tendency to resist it. We become set in our ways and cling to familiarity.
The problem with resisting change is that it limits our growth and experiences. It keeps us stuck in our comfort zone and prevents us from adapting to new circumstances.
Instead of pushing back against change, try embracing it. See it as an opportunity for growth and learning. This doesn’t mean you have to love every change that comes your way, but accepting it as a part of life can make the journey a lot smoother.
5) Neglecting self-care
I recall a time when I was constantly on the go, juggling work, family, and a multitude of other responsibilities. I was so focused on keeping everything else running smoothly, I completely forgot about taking care of myself.
Before I knew it, my health started to decline. I was always tired, irritable, and had little energy for anything fun or social. It took a wake-up call from my doctor to realize that I couldn’t pour from an empty cup.
I started to prioritize self-care. Exercise, healthy eating, and time for relaxation became non-negotiable parts of my day. And as my health improved, so did my mood and energy levels.
6) Avoiding new experiences
As we age, it’s easy to get stuck in our routines and avoid trying new things. But doing so can limit our joy and make us less interesting to be around.
New experiences expand our perspectives, challenge our assumptions, and stimulate our minds. Whether it’s trying a new cuisine, learning a new skill, or traveling to a new place, novelty can bring spice to our lives.
If you want to be more joyful as you age, say goodbye to avoiding new experiences. Embrace the adventure of life and keep exploring. It will keep you young at heart and make you more enjoyable to be around.
7) Focusing on the negative
The most crucial thing to understand is that our mindset greatly influences our reality. If we constantly focus on the negative, our lives will likely feel negative. Conversely, if we focus on the positive, our lives can feel more joyful and fulfilling.
It’s not about pretending that everything is perfect or ignoring the challenges in life. It’s about choosing to see the good in each day, no matter how small it may seem.
If you want to be more joyful as you age, say goodbye to focusing on the negative. Cultivate a positive mindset and watch how it transforms your life.
Final thoughts: It’s about choice
The complexities of human behavior and emotions are often deeply intertwined with our choices.
One particular choice that stands out is the decision to let go of behaviors that no longer serve us well. This choice is crucial if we aspire to be more joyful and pleasant to be around as we age.
The truth is, aging gracefully isn’t about maintaining a youthful appearance or keeping up with the latest trends. It’s about cultivating a positive mindset, staying open to new experiences, letting go of resentment, and making a conscious effort to be joyful.
It’s about choosing to say goodbye to behaviors that weigh us down and embracing those that lift us up. It’s about choosing joy over negativity, acceptance over judgment, and growth over stagnation.
Just remember, no matter how old you are, it’s never too late to make these choices. It’s never too late to become more joyful as you age.
