Sometimes, life feels hard enough on its own — deadlines, responsibilities, unexpected setbacks.
But you know what makes it even harder? Certain people.
You’ve probably encountered them before — the ones who drain your energy, complicate simple situations, or stir up drama where none exists.
These people aren’t always easy to spot at first. They might come across as charming, well-meaning, or just “a little intense.”
But over time, their behavior starts to weigh on you. These people have a unique ability to make life more difficult than it needs to be.
The good news? Once you learn to recognize these types of people, you can protect your peace and set better boundaries.
Here are some of the most common types of people who can make your life more difficult than it needs to be — and why it’s so important to recognize them before they pull you into their chaos.
1) The constant critic
You know them, that one person who seems to have a knack for finding things to criticize about you.
It doesn’t matter how well you do something, they find a way to bring you down. They make you question your worth, your abilities, even your choices.
It’s not always dramatic, it could just be a subtle comment here and there.
But over time, these little jabs can take a toll on your confidence and happiness.
These individuals don’t contribute anything positive to your life and dealing with them can be exhausting. It’s important to recognize the impact they have on you and take steps to limit their influence in your life.
While it may seem daunting, it’s essential for your well-being. After all, life is difficult enough without having someone constantly trying to bring you down.
2) The energy drainer
Then there’s that person who just drains the life out of you. Psychologists call this type “energy vampires.”
You spend time with them and instead of feeling rejuvenated and happy, you feel tired, stressed, or even sad.
Energy vampires come in different forms. To give you a few examples, they could be:
- A chronic complainer
- Always focusing on the negative
- Playing the victim
- Overly needy and requiring constant attention and reassurance
I remember a friend I used to have. Every time we hung out, I’d leave feeling emotionally exhausted. She was constantly negative, always complaining about her life, her job, her other friends.
To make the long story short, it was like being around a black hole of negativity that sucked all the positivity out of me.
You might feel obligated to help or support these people but it’s important to recognize the toll they take on your own emotional wellbeing.
It’s not selfish to prioritize your own mental health and sometimes that means stepping back from these energy draining relationships.
3) The manipulator
There’s a quote by Eleanor Roosevelt that says, “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”
It’s so simple, yet so profound. But what about those people who have a way of twisting your words, your actions, your feelings until you don’t even know what’s real anymore?
These are the manipulators. They play mind games and use emotional blackmail to control and influence you.
They can make you feel guilty for things you have no control over, or make you question your own judgment.
I’ve dealt with a few of these people in my life, and I can tell you, it’s mind-boggling how they can twist reality to suit their narrative.
Recognizing and distancing yourself from these individuals is crucial for your emotional wellbeing.
Don’t let their manipulative tactics cloud your judgment or shake your self-belief. Remember Roosevelt’s words, and don’t give them the power to make you feel inferior.
4) The constant competitor
Now let’s talk about another type that can be really annoying — the one-upper.
This person sees everything as a competition and is always trying to outdo you.
If you’ve had a bad day, they’ve had a worse one. If you’ve achieved something, they’ve done something bigger and better.
They’re not interested in a mutually supportive relationship; they’re just interested in being on top.
Having to constantly defend your achievements or feel like you’re in an ongoing competition can be mentally exhausting and can definitely make life more challenging than it needs to be.
In a conversation with HuffPost, psychotherapist Jessica Baum suggests an empathetic approach when dealing with a one-upper, as they might be coming from a place of low self-esteem or be unaware of what they’re doing.
She further says, “If the one-upping is hindering your relationship, it’s OK to speak up and share that you need them to listen to you more, because you want to connect with them and feel that they care about your experiences, too.”
5) The all-about-me individual
On the heels of that, let’s talk about the self-absorbed type. This person thinks the world revolves around them and they have little to no regard for others’ feelings or needs. And yes, they absolutely engage in one-upping, too!
Every conversation, every situation, every decision has to be about them. There’s no room for your thoughts, your feelings or your needs.
I’ve had my fair share of encounters with these individuals. It feels like being in a one-sided relationship where you’re constantly giving and they’re constantly taking.
This imbalance can be draining and can make your life more difficult than it needs to be.
Just like with the one-upper, it’s important to speak up and take steps to ensure that your needs and feelings are also being considered and respected.
6) The guilt-tripper
The guilt-tripper, a master at making you feel bad about something, even when you know you’ve done nothing wrong.
They have a knack for twisting situations to make it seem like you’re the bad guy. You find yourself constantly apologizing, even when you’re not sure what for.
It’s like walking on eggshells all the time, always worried about doing something that might set them off.
I had a colleague once who was a pro at this. Any mistake, no matter how minor, would be blown out of proportion and somehow always ended up being my fault.
Living with this constant guilt can be incredibly stressful and can make your life much more difficult than it needs to be.
Coming to terms with their tactics and deciding not to let them affect your peace of mind is crucial in maintaining a healthy emotional state.
7) The perfectionist
At first glance, the perfectionist might seem like an asset in your life.
After all, they have high standards, pay attention to detail, and strive for excellence.
But spend enough time around them, and you’ll notice how their obsession with “perfect” can turn even the simplest tasks into drawn-out ordeals.
What should be a quick decision or a “good enough” solution suddenly becomes a marathon of nitpicking, overthinking, and endless revisions.
The perfectionist’s need for control can make you feel like you’re constantly walking on eggshells.
Nothing is ever quite “right” in their eyes, which means you’re often stuck waiting on their approval or redoing tasks that were perfectly fine the first time.
Their inability to accept mistakes — their own or yours — creates unnecessary pressure, stress, and delays.
While their intentions may be good, their relentless pursuit of flawlessness makes everything feel harder than it needs to be.
Dealing with a perfectionist requires setting clear boundaries and, sometimes, reminding them (and yourself) that “done is better than perfect.”
8) The unappreciative
Finally, we have the unappreciative. These people take everything you do for granted.
You go out of your way for them, make sacrifices, but they never acknowledge or appreciate your efforts.
The lack of gratitude can be hurtful and discouraging, and over time, it can make you feel undervalued and unloved.
I’ve experienced this firsthand with a relative who never seemed to appreciate anything I did for them. Despite all the time and effort I put into helping them, they never once said thank you or showed any sort of gratitude.
Dealing with such a person can really bring you down and make life more difficult than it needs to be.
It’s important to surround yourself with people who value and appreciate you. You deserve recognition for your efforts and kindness, don’t let anyone make you feel otherwise.
Final thoughts
Navigating life’s challenges is a daunting task and sometimes, the people around us can make it even more difficult.
If you find yourself identifying with the situations described above, know that it’s okay to establish boundaries and prioritize your well-being.
Dealing with difficult individuals doesn’t have to be a life sentence. You hold the power to define how much impact they have on your life.
It starts with self-awareness. Recognize the patterns of interaction that are causing you stress or discomfort. Once you see these patterns, you can begin to take steps to address them.
Does this person align with your values and priorities? Do they respect your boundaries? Do their actions honor your authentic self? Asking these questions can help you evaluate your relationships and decide what changes need to be made.
Remember, you deserve to be surrounded by people who uplift you, respect you, and make your life brighter. Don’t settle for less.
