Are you Talking Past Each Other?

Too often these days we end up talking past each other.

When the other person is talking to often we are thinking about what we want to say next or what we missed saying the last time we had our opportunity to talk.

That is a classic case of talking past each other.

What can we do about it?

It’s simple. Be present.

It’s as simple as focusing on the conversation and being present in the moment.

Is it hard to do?

Absolutely. It can be very hard to do and even harder execute.

So, what can you do about it?

Again, it is simple.

  • Take a moment
  • Take a breath
  • Take a beat

And focus on where you are right now.

  • Focus on what you want to accomplish right now
  • Focus on what you want out of the conversation
  • Focus on what you think they want out of the conversation

Then make it happen.

How do you know what the other person wants out of the conversation?

That’s easy. Ask them!

Pro tip: Never go to a meeting that doesn’t have an agenda.

Before you meet with someone set the ground rules of what you want to accomplish and what you expect to happen.

This doesn’t always work. Because sometimes you’re in the office, on elevator, at a tradeshow, or just out in the wild. And you don’t always have that moment to set context.

But, when you get that impromptu request you can take a moment to ask what the other party wants out of the conversation. Set SMART Goals

Take a moment and ask.

Pro Tip: Learn to say NO like a pro – Read How You Can Say ‘No’ Like a Pro

When you have the time… take the time and:

  • Set the tone
  • Set the pace
  • Set the agenda

The ends will justify the means.

Take the time to prepare. Take the time to really listen. And, most important of all, take the time to be present.

When you can master this one skill you will stand out in your career. You will be known for hosting effective meetings and having meaningful conversations.

Picture of Jeff Shuey

Jeff Shuey

Jeff is an expert in the Enterprise Content Management industry. He brings over 20 years of Channel Sales, Partner Marketing and Alliance expertise to audiences around the world in speaking engagements and via his writing. He has worked for Microsoft, Kodak, and K2. He is currently consulting with Microsoft and partners to drive Community Engagement and Alliances. Follow him on Twitter @jshuey or on LinkedIn: in/JeffShuey

TRENDING AROUND THE WEB

The Bulwark turned Republican exile into a $20 million media business. Now it has to prove its community can outlast Trump

The Bulwark turned Republican exile into a $20 million media business. Now it has to prove its community can outlast Trump

The Blog Herald

Only one in four Americans now trust the news, a record low that leaves them at less than half the levels reported in Finland, Kenya and Nigeria

Only one in four Americans now trust the news, a record low that leaves them at less than half the levels reported in Finland, Kenya and Nigeria

The Blog Herald

Bluesky lost half its active users, which is what can happen to a bubble with nobody to fight

Bluesky lost half its active users, which is what can happen to a bubble with nobody to fight

The Blog Herald

Real confidence rarely needs to announce itself: it shows up as stillness under pressure, a level voice when everyone else in the room is raising theirs, a willingness to let silence sit for a few extra seconds, and no need to perform for an audience that was never really watching

Real confidence rarely needs to announce itself: it shows up as stillness under pressure, a level voice when everyone else in the room is raising theirs, a willingness to let silence sit for a few extra seconds, and no need to perform for an audience that was never really watching

Global English Editing

Attention Is More Than a Resource to Manage. It Is a Relationship With the Living World.

Attention Is More Than a Resource to Manage. It Is a Relationship With the Living World.

The Vessel

A survey of 2,000 women over 45 commissioned by the herbal remedy brand A. Vogel found that more than two-thirds felt completely ignored by men the moment they walked into a crowded room, and 46 percent said no one around them seemed to understand what that shift actually felt like

A survey of 2,000 women over 45 commissioned by the herbal remedy brand A. Vogel found that more than two-thirds felt completely ignored by men the moment they walked into a crowded room, and 46 percent said no one around them seemed to understand what that shift actually felt like

Global English Editing