There’s a thin line between feeling humble and feeling undeserving.
The distinction is in belief. Believing you’re humble is acknowledging your accomplishments without arrogance. Believing you’re undeserving, however, is dismissing your achievements and success.
Often, those who don’t feel deserving have subtle habits that represent their mindset. They might not be easy to spot, but once you know what to look for, they’re quite telling.
In this article, I’m going to share with you seven subtle habits of people who don’t genuinely feel they’re deserving of success.
These are habits often overlooked but can reveal a lot about a person’s self-perception.
1) Constant self-deprecation
We all know those people who make self-deprecating jokes. They’re charming, aren’t they? It’s easy to mistake it for humility or a good sense of humor.
But there’s a fine line between self-deprecation and self-sabotage.
People who don’t genuinely feel they’re deserving of success often resort to constant self-deprecation. They downplay their accomplishments and dismiss compliments, often with a casual joke or two about their apparent incompetence.
This habit tends to stem from a deeper sense of unworthiness. They’re convinced they don’t deserve praise or success, so they deflect it before anyone else can.
It’s a defense mechanism – if they discredit themselves first, it won’t sting as much if someone else does it.
But be careful not to confuse this with modesty – it’s a symptom of something much deeper, a lack of self-belief that can hinder personal growth and success.
2) Procrastination
Ah, procrastination – an old friend I know all too well.
It’s a tricky beast. You can spend hours, days, or even weeks putting off tasks that you know you need to do.
But why? Fear of failure? Perfectionism?
For me, it was a bit of both, mixed with the lingering feeling that no matter how hard I worked, I just wasn’t cut out for success.
I’d find myself delaying tasks until the very last minute, often resulting in subpar work or missed deadlines.
It was a self-fulfilling prophecy – my fear of not being good enough led me to underperform, which only confirmed my belief that I didn’t deserve success.
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Procrastination is a common habit among people who don’t genuinely feel they’re deserving of success.
It’s a form of self-sabotage that can be hard to recognize but is incredibly damaging in the long run. It’s not just about laziness or poor time management – it’s a sign of deeper self-doubt and fear of failure.
3) Overworking
Here’s something that might surprise you – people who don’t genuinely feel they’re deserving of success often overwork themselves.
They’re convinced they have to work twice as hard as everyone else to achieve the same level of success. They believe that their worth is tied directly to their productivity, leading them to put in excessive hours and neglect other aspects of their lives.
Research published in Science Direct found that individuals with low self-esteem are more likely to exhibit workaholic tendencies.
This behavior is often driven by a desire to compensate for self-doubt and validate their worth through external accomplishments, which can ultimately take a toll on their health and relationships.
4) Reluctance to take on leadership roles
People who don’t genuinely feel they’re deserving of success often shy away from leadership roles.
They’re plagued with self-doubt and worry about their capability to lead others effectively.
They’re more comfortable in the background, preferring to let others take the spotlight. They may believe that they don’t have the necessary skills or expertise to take charge, despite evidence to the contrary.
This fear and reluctance can hinder their career growth and prevent them from reaching their full potential. They miss out on opportunities simply because they don’t believe they’re capable or worthy of them.
A leader isn’t someone who knows everything but someone willing to learn and grow. So don’t let self-doubt hold you back from stepping up.
5) Avoiding recognition and rewards
I remember the first time I won an award at work. I should have been thrilled, right? Instead, I found myself feeling incredibly uncomfortable.
I tried to downplay it, insisting that it was a team effort and that I didn’t do anything special.
Looking back, I realize that this was a classic sign of not feeling deserving of success. Despite clear indicators of my hard work and achievements, I felt like an imposter, waiting for someone to realize that I was a fraud.
People who don’t genuinely feel they’re deserving of success often avoid recognition and rewards.
They’re uncomfortable with praise and will often redirect it to others. They may even feel guilty or anxious when rewarded for their efforts.
This habit is not just about modesty. It’s about a deep-seated belief that they’re not worthy of accolades. And it’s this belief that needs to be addressed if they’re ever going to embrace their success fully.
6) Comparing themselves to others
People who don’t genuinely feel they’re deserving of success have a habit of constantly comparing themselves to others.
They measure their achievements against those of their peers, friends, or even strangers they see on social media.
This constant comparison can lead to feelings of inadequacy and reinforce the belief that they’re not deserving of success. No matter how much they accomplish, there’s always someone who seems to be doing better, achieving more.
Comparison is not only the thief of joy but also the thief of self-confidence.
When you’re constantly measuring your worth against others, you’re bound to feel like you’re falling short. It’s important to remember that everyone has their own unique path and pace in life. Success is not a race or competition.
7) Dismissing their potential
The most detrimental habit of people who don’t genuinely feel they’re deserving of success is dismissing their potential.
They tend to underestimate their capabilities and limit their aspirations. They aim low, convinced that they’re not cut out for greatness.
This self-imposed limitation can prevent them from exploring new opportunities and taking risks. It’s another self-fulfilling prophecy – they don’t believe they can achieve more, so they don’t.
Your potential is not defined by your doubts or fears.
It’s defined by your willingness to step out of your comfort zone, take on challenges, and believe in your capabilities, even when you don’t feel deserving. You are capable of more than you think. Don’t let self-doubt hold you back.
Wrapping up: It’s all about self-perception
The complexity of human behavior often finds its roots in our self-perception.
In the case of people who don’t genuinely feel they’re deserving of success, their behaviors and habits are a manifestation of their inner beliefs about themselves.
Psychologist Carl Rogers once said, “The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.” This implies that recognizing and acknowledging these habits is the first step towards transformation.
If you’ve recognized some of these habits within yourself, it’s not a reason for self-reproach. It’s an opportunity for self-awareness and growth.
Changing your perception about yourself is not an overnight process. It takes time, patience, and consistent effort. But remember, you are deserving of every success you achieve. You are enough just as you are.
As you venture forward, keep this in mind: Your worth is not determined by external achievements, but by the intrinsic value you carry within yourself.