When is it okay to put others first — and when should you prioritize yourself?
It’s a tricky balance, especially when we’re constantly told to “set boundaries” and “put yourself first.”
But here’s the thing — there are moments in life when putting others ahead of yourself isn’t just the right thing to do — it’s necessary.
These moments aren’t about self-sacrifice or being a pushover. They’re about recognizing that sometimes, true strength comes from showing up for others in a big way.
The key is knowing when it’s worth it. If you’re wondering when it’s okay (or even essential) to put others first, here are 7 situations where doing so can make all the difference.
1) In times of crisis
We all encounter periods of turmoil in our lives—these crises, whether they’re personal or affecting a wider community, call for a shift in our priorities.
During such times, it’s not just about survival, it’s about solidarity.
We’re asked to step outside of our personal bubble and consider the needs of others who may be more vulnerable or less equipped to handle the situation.
In a crisis, our personal goals and ambitions take a backseat as it’s about coming together, offering support, and ensuring the well-being of the collective.
Yet, this doesn’t mean ignoring your own needs entirely—it’s about striking a balance, one that leans more towards the greater good in these extraordinary circumstances.
2) When someone close is going through a hard time
Personal relationships are at the core of our lives. Friends, family, partners—these are the people we turn to for support, love, and companionship.
There was a time when my best friend was going through a tough divorce: It was an emotionally draining time for her, filled with uncertainty and pain.
During that period, I consciously decided to put her needs ahead of my own.
Whether it was being there to listen, providing a shoulder to cry on, or helping with practical matters like moving her things, my focus was on making her life a bit easier.
In such situations, it’s crucial to step up and be there for your loved ones.
It’s about understanding their pain and providing comfort and recognizing when someone else’s are far more pressing.
Always remember, when those close to us hurt, we are equally hurt too.
3) When you’re in a leadership position
Being a leader isn’t just about making tough decisions or guiding a team towards a goal—it’s about recognizing the needs of your team members and creating an environment that fosters growth and success for everyone.
It’s known that leaders who put their team’s needs ahead of their own—often referred to as ‘servant leaders’—create happier, more productive work environments.
These leaders understand that their success is directly tied to the success of their team and they prioritize the professional and personal growth of their team members, often sacrificing their own comfort or convenience in the process.
4) When you’re a parent
Parenting is perhaps the most poignant example of putting someone else’s needs ahead of your own.
From the moment a child is born, their needs, safety, and well-being become a parent’s top priority.
Sleepless nights, endless diaper changes, constant worrying—these are all part and parcel of parenthood and while it’s undoubtedly challenging, it’s also incredibly rewarding.
As a parent, you’re tasked with raising a tiny human into a responsible adult, so this responsibility often requires sacrifices, from your time to your personal aspirations.
Every sacrifice you make is an investment in your child’s future.
In the journey of parenthood, putting your child ahead of yourself isn’t just necessary—it’s a privilege.
5) When you’re part of a group project
Working as part of a team can be both rewarding and challenging because there are times when individual goals must be set aside to ensure the success of the group.
I remember a time in college when I was part of a group project: The assignment was complex, and we had a tight deadline.
One of our team members fell ill, and her portion of the project was far from completion.
Instead of pushing her to finish her work, we decided as a group to share her load amongst ourselves; even if it meant extra work for each of us, we knew it was the right thing to do.
Situations, like this, require you to put the group’s needs ahead of your own to help create a supportive, collaborative environment—understanding the bigger picture and finding a way to work together as a team.
6) When you’re in a position to help
There are times in life when we find ourselves in a position to make a significant difference in someone else’s life.
It may be financially, emotionally, or even just by being there at the right time.
In such situations, it’s important to step up and offer help even by setting aside your own plans or preferences—the positive impact you make can be immense.
This could be anything from lending money to a friend in need, volunteering your time for a cause you believe in, or even just offering a listening ear to someone going through a tough time.
When you have the capacity to help, sometimes it’s essential to put other people ahead of yourself.
7) When empathy is needed
In a world filled with diverse perspectives and experiences, empathy is a powerful tool—it’s about understanding and sharing the feelings of another, stepping into their shoes, and viewing the world from their standpoint.
When we encounter someone struggling with an issue we’ve never faced, it’s easy to resort to judgment or indifference but it’s in these moments that empathy matters the most.
Putting other people ahead of yourself is about understanding their pain, their joy, their struggles, and their victories—setting aside our biases and preconceptions and embracing their reality as our own.
In essence, empathy is at the heart of putting others first as it builds bridges, fosters relationships, and makes the world a little bit kinder.
Final thoughts: It’s all about balance
Human interactions often hinge on balancing our needs with those of others; knowing when to prioritize others’ needs shows emotional intelligence and empathy.
Yet, self-care remains equally important—it’s about balance, not sacrifice.
Whether supporting a friend, stepping up as a leader, or practicing empathy, putting others first at the right moments can deepen relationships and build mutual respect.
As the Dalai Lama once said, “If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion.”
This simple quote encapsulates the essence of putting others first—it’s not just about making them happy but also about cultivating our happiness through the act of giving.
As you navigate through life, remember that it’s not always about you; sometimes, it’s about putting other people ahead of yourself yet finding the balance.
