If a person is emotionally draining to be around, they’ll usually display these 10 behaviors

Navigating relationships can be tricky, especially when dealing with people who seem to suck the energy right out of you.

These individuals, often labeled as ’emotionally draining’, can leave you feeling exhausted, stressed, or even depressed after spending time with them.

The key to dealing with such people is recognizing their behaviors. Usually, there are tell-tale signs that can help you identify them.

In this article, we’ll look at the top 10 behaviors typically displayed by emotionally draining individuals. By identifying these patterns, you can protect your emotional well-being and maintain healthier interactions.

1) Constant negativity

Life has its ups and downs, and we all have our bad days. However, emotionally draining people seem to exist in a perpetually negative state.

They’re the ones who always see the glass as half empty, who find fault in every situation, and who seem to suck the joy out of even the happiest moments.

Being around constant negativity can be incredibly tiring. It can bring you down and make you feel as if you’re carrying an extra weight.

The problem with such individuals is that their negativity often rubs off on those around them. It’s difficult to maintain a positive outlook when someone is relentlessly bringing you down.

2) They’re always the victim

Another common trait of emotionally draining people is their tendency to always play the victim. Nothing is ever their fault, and they are constantly at the mercy of others’ actions or circumstances beyond their control.

I had a friend who was always going through some crisis or another. Every conversation we had involved her sharing another tale of woe, blaming everyone and everything for her troubles.

Over time, I realized that being around her was leaving me feeling overwhelmed and drained. It was as if I was carrying her burdens on top of my own.

3) They’re emotionally unavailable

Emotionally draining people often lack empathy. They struggle to understand or share the feelings of others, which can make interacting with them quite challenging.

According to research, individuals who lack empathy often have difficulty forming strong, healthy relationships. This lack of emotional depth can lead to one-sided interactions where you’re giving more than you’re receiving.

When you’re around someone who’s emotionally unavailable, it can feel like you’re talking to a wall. Your feelings and experiences may be disregarded, leaving you feeling unheard and emotionally depleted. It’s important to identify this behavior for what it is and take steps to protect your emotional well-being.

4) They’re excessively needy

Have you ever been around someone who seems to need constant attention or reassurance? This is another common trait of emotionally draining people.

These individuals often rely heavily on others for emotional support, validation, or even decision-making. They may frequently reach out to you with their problems or constantly seek your approval.

Such individuals can leave you feeling drained as you’re constantly asked to meet their emotional needs while your own may be neglected. It’s essential to recognize this behavior and establish boundaries where necessary to protect your own emotional health.

5) They’re quick to criticize

Emotionally draining individuals often have a habit of criticizing others. Whether it’s a small jab at your appearance, a snide comment about your work, or a constant comparison with others, these criticisms can wear you down over time.

These individuals often use criticism as a tool to belittle others and elevate themselves. This behavior can take a toll on your self-esteem and leave you feeling emotionally exhausted.

Identifying this toxic behavior is the first step towards protecting yourself from its impact. It’s crucial to remember that their criticism is more a reflection of their insecurities than of your worth.

6) They seldom reciprocate

Relationships are about give and take. However, with emotionally draining people, you may find that you’re always the one giving, while they’re always on the receiving end.

You might be there for them during their tough times, listen to their woes, offer support and advice, but when you need them, they’re nowhere to be found. This lack of reciprocity can leave you feeling depleted and unappreciated.

It’s heartbreaking to realize that someone you’ve invested so much in emotionally isn’t willing to do the same for you. Identifying this behavior is a crucial step towards fostering healthier relationships that nourish you emotionally rather than drain you.

7) They monopolize conversations

Ever been in a conversation where you barely got a word in? That’s a common experience with emotionally draining people. They tend to dominate conversations, making it all about them, their problems, and their experiences.

I once knew someone who would turn every conversation into a monologue about their life. I often found myself feeling unheard and unimportant, like my thoughts and feelings didn’t matter.

This kind of interaction can leave you feeling emotionally exhausted and undervalued. It’s essential to recognize this behavior for what it is and ensure your voice is heard in your relationships.

8) They’re excessively cheerful

While it might seem strange, being around someone who is always excessively cheerful can be emotionally draining. These individuals often mask their true feelings behind a facade of constant positivity.

This can make it challenging to connect with them on a deeper level, as they’re always presenting a cheerful exterior, even when it’s not appropriate or genuine.

This can leave you feeling like you’re interacting with an artificial version of them rather than their real self.

9) They avoid responsibility

Emotionally draining people often have a knack for avoiding responsibility. They’ll blame others, circumstances, or even the universe for their problems, never acknowledging their own role in the situation.

This lack of accountability can be frustrating and exhausting to deal with. It can feel like you’re dealing with a child rather than a mature adult, which can be incredibly draining.

Identifying this behaviour is crucial. Recognising it will allow you to manage your interactions with such individuals more effectively and maintain your emotional equilibrium.

10) They’re rarely content

A key trait of emotionally draining people is their perpetual discontent. Regardless of what they have or achieve, they’re never truly satisfied. They’re constantly chasing the next big thing, the next high, the next source of validation.

Being around such perpetual discontent can be exhausting. It’s a reminder that happiness and contentment can’t be found in external achievements or validations, but within ourselves.

This is perhaps the most important thing to remember when dealing with emotionally draining individuals.

Final thoughts: It’s about self-care

It’s crucial to remember that emotional well-being is a fundamental aspect of overall health. Just as we take care of our physical health, it’s equally important to nurture our emotional health.

When we encounter emotionally draining individuals, understanding their behaviors equips us with the tools to protect our emotional energy. It allows us to create boundaries, foster healthier interactions, and prioritize our own emotional needs.

Recognizing these behaviors isn’t about judging others but rather about self-preservation. It’s about recognizing who enriches our lives and who depletes them.

At the end of the day, it’s about making choices that contribute to our happiness and well-being. So make sure you choose wisely.

Picture of Lachlan Brown

Lachlan Brown

I’m Lachlan Brown, the founder, and editor of Hack Spirit. I love writing practical articles that help others live a mindful and better life. I have a graduate degree in Psychology and I’ve spent the last 15 years reading and studying all I can about human psychology and practical ways to hack our mindsets. Check out my latest book on the Hidden Secrets of Buddhism and How it Saved My Life. If you want to get in touch with me, hit me up on Facebook or Twitter.

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