Growing up wasn’t the easiest for me, or perhaps for you too.
You saw your parents wrestling with bills, skipping meals so you wouldn’t have to, and selling things they cherished just to make ends meet.
You were just a kid but you knew, things were tough.
You’ve tried to shake it off, move past it.
But the experiences from your formative years have a way of sticking around, making a deep impact on who you become. And in some ways, they’ve shaped the person you are today.
I’m not here to make you wallow in the past.
No, my goal is to help you recognize the traits that have developed within you as a result of those difficult times.
Traits that might be influencing your decisions and your life today, even when you don’t realize it.
With this introspection, I hope to provide you with a clearer understanding of yourself.
So let’s explore these 8 traits you’ve developed if you witnessed your parents going through financial hardship as a child.
1) Frugality is second nature to you
Frugality isn’t something you read about and adopted. It’s a cornerstone of your life, etched into your core during those tough times.
Parents struggling with finances are often masters of stretching every dollar, and as a child, you saw this in action.
You’ve seen them make do with less, create meals out of what was available, and prioritize necessities over desires.
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Now, you find yourself doing the same.
You’re the person who compares prices at the grocery store, who can make a meal out of seemingly nothing, who thinks twice before making any purchases.
This frugality isn’t born out of need anymore but has become an integral part of who you are.
This trait can be both a strength and a weakness.
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On one hand, it ensures that you’re always financially cautious – a great life skill. On the other hand, it might hold you back from treating yourself or investing in experiences or items that could bring joy or growth into your life.
2) You’re always planning for the worst-case scenario
This is something I noticed about myself a few years back.
I was always prepping, always ready for the worst possible outcome.
It wasn’t a conscious decision, it just came naturally to me.
Growing up, I saw my parents constantly worrying about what would happen if they didn’t have enough money for the month.
They had plans B, C, and D ready to roll.
There was always a sense of impending doom, and I realized that this had translated into my own life.
I found myself constantly creating contingency plans in all aspects of my life – not just financial.
What if I lost my job?
What if my car broke down?
What if I got sick?
These questions were on constant repeat in my mind, often leading me to over-prepare and over-think.
And while it’s good to be prepared, it’s also important to realize when this behavior is causing unnecessary stress or anxiety.
Being aware of this trait can help you take steps towards finding a balance between being prepared and enjoying the moment.
3) You value experiences over material possessions
There’s a quote by Oscar Wilde that goes, “Ordinary riches can be stolen, real riches cannot. In your soul are infinitely precious things that cannot be taken from you.”
Growing up with financial hardships, I learned this lesson early on.
Material possessions were fleeting, often sold to cover bills or buy necessities. But the experiences, the moments of joy and love, those were the real treasures.
I remember one Christmas when money was particularly tight.
There were no presents under the tree, no festive feast on the table.
But my parents made it special in their own way. We spent the day together, playing board games, sharing stories, and laughing – a lot. That memory is more precious to me than any gift I could have received.
I find myself carrying this lesson into adulthood.
When given a choice between buying something or experiencing something, I almost always choose the latter.
Instead of buying an expensive car, I’d rather use the money to travel or learn a new skill.
This trait isn’t necessarily negative or positive – it’s just different.
4) You have a heightened sense of empathy
You likely connect deeply with others, especially those going through tough times. Their pain, struggles, and fears may feel like your own, even though not everyone shares this ability to empathize so intensely.
Research suggests that children who endure hardships often develop heightened empathy.
You may find that your own experiences allow you to understand and share the emotions of others more easily.
For instance, growing up, perhaps you witnessed your parents facing challenges, and this made you more aware of others’ difficulties. It likely shaped your sense of compassion and understanding for those around you.
Consider a time when someone close to you faced a financial crisis.
While others might have been quick to offer advice, you probably found yourself sitting with them, listening without judgment, simply being there. It wasn’t about fixing the problem but letting them know they weren’t alone.
This empathy can be both a strength and a challenge. While it enables you to connect with others on a deeper level, it can also drain you emotionally.
Learning to set boundaries will allow you to help others without compromising your own well-being.
5) You’re fiercely independent
From an early age, you might have learned the value of independence, especially if you grew up watching your family handle things on their own.
The ability to rely on yourself has likely become second nature.
This trait may show up in how you approach everything from home repairs to career challenges.
You probably prefer handling things solo, taking pride in your ability to manage without asking for assistance.
Perhaps when you moved into your first apartment, you took it upon yourself to handle everything, from assembling furniture to setting up utilities.
While others sought help, you embraced the challenge, finding satisfaction in your self-reliance.
6) You have a strong work ethic
Growing up with parents who worked tirelessly likely ingrained a deep sense of dedication and perseverance in you.
Their long hours and determination may have influenced how you approach your own work and responsibilities.
This ethic likely carries into all areas of your life, from professional commitments to personal projects. Whether it’s staying late to finish a task or putting in extra effort on the weekends, you’re no stranger to hard work.
Take your first job as an example.
The long hours and heavy workload may not have deterred you; in fact, you might have thrived under pressure, viewing hard work as a natural part of life.
Others may have wondered how you managed to stay so driven, but for you, it was simply a reflection of your upbringing.
7) You’re highly adaptable
Living with financial instability breeds adaptability.
Plans change. Things go wrong.
But you learn to adjust, to shift gears, and make the best of what you have.
I’ve found that this adaptability extends far beyond financial circumstances.
It has made me flexible in thought and action. I can adjust to new environments, accommodate changes at work, and even navigate personal relationships with ease.
When I think back to my early years, I remember constantly moving houses due to financial constraints.
Each move meant a new neighborhood, a new school, and new friends. It was tough, but it taught me how to adapt quickly, how to fit in, how to start over.
While being adaptable can be an invaluable trait in our ever-changing world, it’s also crucial to recognize when you’re constantly bending for others or situations at the expense of your own needs or well-being.
Adaptability is a strength when it allows you to weather life’s challenges but it’s equally important to stand your ground when necessary.
8) You value financial stability
Growing up in an environment where money was often a source of stress likely left you with a deep appreciation for financial stability.
You’ve seen firsthand the uncertainty that comes from not knowing if bills can be paid, and now, you probably prioritize security in your own life.
You might be someone who’s proactive about managing finances—whether it’s budgeting, saving, or investing.
You likely understand that financial stability isn’t just about having money; it’s about peace of mind and the freedom to make choices.
For example, when you received your first paycheck, perhaps your immediate thought was to set aside some savings rather than spending it all.
That moment may have marked the start of your journey toward financial security, reflecting the lessons you’ve carried from your past.
While it’s wise to prioritize financial health, it’s also important to find a balance between saving for the future and enjoying the present.
Money is a tool to enhance your life, not the end goal, so remember to take time to enjoy the fruits of your hard work.