Small habits—things we say, how we respond, or the way we carry ourselves—can make the difference between coming across as confident and clear or uncertain and misunderstood.
If you want to become a great communicator, it’s not just about honing your speaking skills—it’s also about unlearning what’s holding you back.
Today, we’ll uncover eight such habits that could be standing in the way of communicating at your best.
Let’s dive in.
1) Filler words
Communication isn’t just about what you say, but how you say it. And sometimes, it’s about what you don’t say.
Filler words, those little ‘um’s,’ ‘ah’s,’ ‘like’s,’ and ‘you know’s’ that sneak into our speech, are among the worst offenders.
Why?
Because they dilute our message and can make us seem unsure or unprepared. For instance, researchers have noted, “Excessive use of fillers in scientific presentations can reduce the speaker’s credibility as well as impair the comprehension of the speaker’s message by the audience.”
That’s not the impression a high-level communicator wants to give.
The first step in kicking this habit is awareness. Record yourself in a conversation or presentation and play it back. Hearing your own filler words can be a real wake-up call.
Next, practice pausing. Silence is powerful. It gives you time to collect your thoughts and lends weight to what you’re about to say.
2) Using excessive jargon
We all want to sound intelligent and professional, but excessive use of industry-specific lingo can alienate or annoy our audience.
Research backs this up. A Preply Survey of over 1,000 Americans found that “lean in” and “new normal” were the top offenders.
High-level communicators prioritize clear communication over sounding impressive. They understand their audience and adjust their language accordingly.
Is it time to simplify? Remember, your goal is to be understood, not to sound smart.
3) Over-explaining
I’ll confess, I’ve been an over-explainer my entire life. I felt that providing more details made me seem more thorough and reliable.
But I soon realized this habit was doing more harm than good.
In one instance, during a team meeting, I was explaining a project I was leading. Instead of sticking to key points, I delved into every nitty-gritty detail. The meeting ran over time, and my colleagues seemed more confused than enlightened.
That’s when it hit me. Over-explaining doesn’t add clarity; it muddles the message.
High-level communicators know that less is often more. They understand the power of simplicity and clarity.
4) Negative body language
Have you ever found yourself crossing your arms during a conversation? Or perhaps avoiding eye contact when you’re nervous?
As Ronald E. Riggio, a professor of psychology and leadership, has pointed out, “How we present ourselves to others nonverbally can have a big impact on how we are perceived, and treated, by others.”
For instance, crossed arms can signal defensiveness or discomfort, even if you’re just cold or trying to get comfortable.
Lack of eye contact can come across as disinterest, dishonesty, or insecurity—none of which help your message land effectively.
Slouching might make you appear unconfident or disinterested, while fidgeting can suggest anxiety or impatience.
High-level communicators are mindful of their nonverbal cues. They know that open, relaxed posture, consistent eye contact, and purposeful gestures reinforce their message and help build trust with their audience.
It’s not just what you say; it’s how you say it—and how you show it. If you want to be perceived as confident and trustworthy, your body language needs to match your words.
5) Assuming you’re always right
This is another one I have been guilty of.
I used to think I had all the answers. I was confident, perhaps too confident, and it reflected in my communication.
But then came a project that knocked me off my high horse. Despite my assurance, things didn’t go as planned. The project failed, and I had to face the reality that I was not infallible.
This was a turning point for me. I realized that being a high-level communicator meant being open to the possibility of being wrong. It meant listening to others’ opinions and ideas, even when they contradicted my own.
6) Interrupting others
Listening is just as important as speaking in effective communication. But how can you listen if you’re always interrupting?
Interrupting others not only shows disrespect but also hinders your ability to understand their perspective fully.
Great communicators know that as put by Epictetus “We have two ears and one mouth so that we can listen twice as much as we speak.”.
They let others speak, ask thoughtful questions, and make sure they fully understand before responding.
7) Speaking without considering your audience
Ever found yourself talking to a group and realizing halfway through that they’re completely lost or disengaged?
It’s an easy trap to fall into when you’re more focused on what you want to say than on who you’re speaking to.
A key trait of high-level communicators is that they always consider their audience. They tailor their message to match the audience’s knowledge, interests, and needs.
Whether they’re presenting to a room full of experts or explaining a concept to someone unfamiliar with the topic, they adjust their language, tone, and content to ensure clarity and relevance.
When you fail to consider your audience, you risk losing their attention and failing to connect. A complex explanation, a long-winded backstory, or language that’s too technical or too casual can make your message fall flat.
So before your next conversation or presentation, ask yourself: Who am I speaking to? What do they already know? What do they care about? Then, craft your message accordingly. It’s not about dumbing things down; it’s about meeting your audience where they are to communicate more effectively.
8) Ignoring feedback
Feedback is a gift. It provides an outside perspective on your communication style and highlights areas for improvement.
High-level communicators don’t shy away from feedback. They seek it out, take it to heart, and use it to continually improve their communication skills.
If you’ve been dismissing or ignoring feedback, it’s time to change. Embrace feedback with an open mind and a commitment to growth. It’s the most surefire way to elevate your communication skills.
The final thought: The power is in your hands
Becoming a high-level communicator isn’t just about mastering eloquent speech or finding the right words—it’s about cultivating habits that enhance clarity, connection, and confidence.
Whether it’s eliminating filler words, maintaining open body language, actively listening, or tailoring your message to your audience, these small shifts can make a world of difference.
Are you ready to elevate how you connect with others? Start by tackling one habit at a time and watch your communication—and relationships—transform.
