Hi there, Lachlan Brown here, founder of Hack Spirit and an avid mindfulness enthusiast. Let’s talk about emotional strength – a rarely acknowledged but incredibly vital trait.
It’s the ability to bounce back from adversity, handle stress effectively, and navigate the complexities of life with grace. It sounds tough, right? Well, it is.
However, if you’ve successfully navigated through these 8 challenges that I’m about to reveal, you’re displaying extraordinary emotional strength – far more than most people.
Let’s get started.
1. Mastering the art of self-care
Let’s face it: life can be tough. It’s often a rollercoaster of ups and downs, and the downs can sometimes hit hard.
If you’ve managed to cultivate the habit of self-care, you’re one step ahead. This means that you don’t just take care of your physical health but also your mental well-being.
You’ve learned to recognize when you’re feeling low and have strategies in place to lift yourself back up. You’re not afraid to take a step back when things get too much, and you make time for activities that bring you joy and peace.
This doesn’t mean you’re self-centered or selfish. It simply means you understand that to help others, you first need to help yourself.
Mastering the art of self-care is a clear sign of emotional strength, as it requires self-awareness, resilience, and the ability to prioritize your emotional health.
2. Bouncing back from failure
Failure – it’s a tough pill to swallow, isn’t it? Trust me, I’ve been there.
I remember when I first started Hack Spirit. The initial few months were full of setbacks and disappointments. There were times when I seriously considered throwing in the towel.
But I didn’t. I took each failure as a learning opportunity and kept going. It wasn’t easy, but with each setback, I became more resilient.
If you’ve experienced failure (and who hasn’t?), and managed to pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and keep going – that’s a true sign of emotional strength.
You’ve learned that failure isn’t the end of the world but a stepping stone to success.
As Thomas Edison famously said, “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” Overcoming failure is an incredible testament to your emotional strength.
3. Letting go of ego
Now, this is a big one. Ego – it can be our worst enemy if not kept in check.
If you’ve learned to let go of your ego, to accept that you’re not always right and that there’s always something new to learn, you’re displaying a significant level of emotional strength.
This means you’re open to feedback and criticism and can use it to grow rather than taking it personally. You’re comfortable with who you are and don’t feel the need to prove yourself to others.
In my book, Hidden Secrets of Buddhism: How To Live With Maximum Impact and Minimum Ego, I delve into the concept of letting go of one’s ego from a Buddhist perspective. It’s about embracing humility and understanding that our ego can often cloud our judgment and prevent us from reaching our full potential.
Learning to tame your ego is not an easy task. But once you do, it opens up a whole new world of possibilities.
As the famous psychologist Sigmund Freud once said, “The ego is not master in its own house.” Recognizing this and learning to let go of your ego is a true sign of emotional strength.
4. Embracing vulnerability
Embracing vulnerability is a big step towards emotional strength. It means you are comfortable with your emotions, even the uncomfortable ones, and you’re not afraid to be seen in a moment of weakness.
Psychologists have found that vulnerability is not a weakness but a strength. It shows that you are authentic and in touch with your emotions, and it allows others to connect with you on a deeper level.
It’s about having the courage to express your feelings openly and honestly, even when it’s scary. It’s about being brave enough to admit when you’re wrong or when you need help.
Vulnerability is also about taking risks, even when there’s a chance of failure. It requires emotional strength to step out of your comfort zone and take a leap of faith.
Brené Brown, a renowned psychologist and research professor, states “Vulnerability is not winning or losing; it’s having the courage to show up and be seen when we have no control over the outcome.”
5. Saying no when necessary
Here’s a surprising one: the ability to say ‘no’.
In a world where we’re often encouraged to be compliant and agreeable, the ability to assertively say ‘no’ when necessary is a clear sign of emotional strength.
You see, it’s easy to say ‘yes’ to avoid conflict or to please others, but it can lead to resentment, burnout, and a loss of self-respect over time.
On the other hand, saying ‘no’ means that you value your time, energy, and emotional well-being. It shows that you have boundaries and you’re not afraid to enforce them.
This might seem counter-intuitive because we often associate strength with being accommodating. But the truth is, constant compliance can be damaging in the long run.
6. Accepting change
Change is a part of life. But let’s be honest, it can be scary and uncomfortable.
If you’ve learned to accept and adapt to change, rather than resist it, you’re showing a high level of emotional strength.
Whether it’s a change in your personal life, like a relationship ending, or a professional shift like a job loss or promotion, your ability to accept and adapt to these changes speaks volumes about your resilience.
Accepting change means understanding that life is uncertain and unpredictable. It’s about letting go of control and learning to ride the wave of life with grace and flexibility.
As the renowned psychologist Albert Ellis once said, “The best years of your life are the ones in which you decide your problems are your own. You do not blame them on your mother, the ecology, or the president. You realize that you control your own destiny.”
Embracing change, taking responsibility for your reactions to it, and understanding that you control your destiny is a true sign of emotional strength.
7. Forgiving and letting go of grudges
Holding onto anger, resentment, and grudges can be like carrying a heavy backpack. It weighs you down, drains your energy, and prevents you from moving forward.
If you’ve managed to forgive and let go of grudges, it’s a clear sign of emotional strength.
A few years back, a close friend betrayed my trust in a way that was quite hurtful. It was easy to hold onto the anger and resentment, but over time, I realized it was only hurting me. So I chose to forgive and let go.
Forgiveness doesn’t mean forgetting or excusing the wrong. It’s about freeing yourself from the burden of resentment and making peace with the past.
8. Seeking help when needed
In a society that often values independence and self-reliance, seeking help can sometimes be seen as a sign of weakness. But the opposite is true.
If you’ve recognized when you’re in over your head and have had the courage to seek help, whether it’s from a trusted friend, family member, or professional therapist, you’ve shown immense emotional strength.
Understanding that we all have limitations and that it’s okay to ask for help is a sign of self-awareness and emotional maturity. It’s about recognizing that we don’t have to face life’s challenges alone, and there’s strength in reaching out to others.
The essence of emotional strength
At the end of the day, emotional strength isn’t about being stoic or unfeeling. It’s about how you navigate life’s ups and downs, the way you bounce back from adversity, and how you manage your emotions in the face of challenges.
If you’ve overcome these 8 challenges, it’s clear that you possess a level of emotional strength that surpasses most people. You’ve learned to adapt, to grow, and to lean into your emotions rather than shy away from them.
But remember, emotional strength is not a destination but a journey. It’s an ongoing process of learning, growing, and becoming more resilient.
In my book Hidden Secrets of Buddhism: How To Live With Maximum Impact and Minimum Ego, I dive deeper into these concepts of emotional strength and resilience from a Buddhist perspective. It’s a great resource for those looking to further cultivate their emotional strength.
So here’s to you – for your resilience, your courage, and your emotional strength. You are stronger than you think. Reflect on that as you continue your journey.
In the words of the great psychologist Carl Rogers, “The good life is a process, not a state of being. It is a direction, not a destination.” Keep moving in the right direction.