Navigating the waters when you’re dealing with a stubborn leader can be a real test of patience. The ones that won’t entertain any opinion but their own are the toughest.
But we all have to deal with them at some point, right? It’s a part of life, both in our professional and personal worlds.
And while it’s easy to throw your hands up in frustration, there are actually strategies you can use to manage these situations.
In this article, I’m going to share eight practical ways to cope when you’re dealing with a leader who’s not open to any viewpoint but their own. Let’s dive in, shall we?
1) Acceptance
Let’s face it, dealing with a leader who is unwilling to listen to anyone’s opinion but their own can be a downright challenge.
And while it’s tempting to try and alter their behavior, the first step is actually acceptance. It might sound counterintuitive, but bear with me here.
Acceptance doesn’t mean that you agree with the leader or that you’re giving up. Far from it. It’s about acknowledging the situation for what it is.
Understanding that your leader is set in their ways allows you to approach the situation pragmatically rather than emotionally. It removes the element of surprise or disappointment when they act predictably, and enables you to strategize around their behavior instead of constantly banging your head against a brick wall.
So take a deep breath, accept the reality, and let’s move forward with this as our foundation.
2) Open Communication
I remember working on a project with a leader who wouldn’t take anyone’s suggestions into account. It was his way or the highway.
At first, it was incredibly frustrating. But then, I realized that perhaps he didn’t understand the value of our suggestions because we were not communicating effectively.
So, I decided to change my approach. Instead of just throwing ideas at him, I started providing clear reasons for my suggestions. I would say something like, “I understand where you’re coming from, but have you considered this perspective? It could potentially lead to these benefits…”
This open and assertive communication made a huge difference. He started to see the logic behind our suggestions and became more open to considering them.
Remember, it’s not just about what you say, but also how you say it. Effective communication can be a game-changer when dealing with a leader who doesn’t listen to others’ opinions.
3) Building Rapport
Rapport is a state of harmonious understanding with another individual that enables smoother communication. Interestingly, FBI negotiators use the technique of building rapport to defuse and resolve conflicts, including hostage situations.
In the context of dealing with a stubborn leader, building rapport can be an effective strategy. When you make the effort to understand them, their motivations and their style of working, you create a connection that can open doors for better communication and understanding.
Find common ground, show genuine interest in their viewpoint, and demonstrate respect for their position. This connection can help soften their rigid stance and make them more amenable to other perspectives.
4) Choose your battles
When dealing with a leader who doesn’t listen to others’ opinions, it’s crucial to know when to press forward with your ideas and when to step back.
Not every disagreement or decision is worth a battle. Sometimes, it’s more strategic to conserve your energy for more significant issues where you can make a real impact.
Recognize that it’s okay to let some things go. By choosing your battles wisely, you maintain your credibility and increase the chances of your voice being heard when it truly matters.
5) Empathy
In the heat of frustration, it’s easy to forget that our leaders are humans too. They have their own challenges, insecurities, and pressure to deal with.
Showing empathy towards your leader can go a long way. Try to understand where they’re coming from. Maybe they’re under a lot of pressure to deliver results, maybe they’ve had past experiences that have led them to be more closed off, or maybe they’re simply not aware of the impact of their behavior.
By demonstrating empathy, you not only humanize them but also create an environment of mutual respect. And who knows? This shift in attitude might just inspire them to be more open to other perspectives.
6) Seeking Support
There was a time when I felt utterly defeated by a leader who wouldn’t listen to anyone else’s viewpoint. I felt unheard, unvalued, and was on the brink of giving up.
That’s when I reached out to my mentor. She reminded me that it wasn’t a reflection on my worth or capabilities, but rather the leader’s inability to be receptive.
She advised me to not isolate myself and instead seek support from trusted colleagues and mentors. This advice made all the difference. It provided me with fresh perspectives, reassurance, and strategies I hadn’t considered before.
Reaching out for support doesn’t mean you’re weak. In fact, it takes strength to admit when you’re struggling and ask for help. So don’t hesitate to seek support when dealing with a difficult leader.
7) Maintain Professionalism
No matter how frustrating the situation gets, it’s crucial to maintain a high level of professionalism. Responding with anger or frustration will only escalate the situation and is unlikely to achieve the desired result.
Instead, remain calm, composed, and respectful in your interactions. Keep the focus on the task at hand and your shared goals.
Remember, your professionalism in handling difficult situations speaks volumes about your character and can significantly influence your leader’s response to you.
8) Self-Care
At the end of the day, the most crucial thing to remember is this: don’t let a difficult leader cost you your peace of mind or well-being.
Working under such leadership can be stressful. So, it’s essential to make self-care a priority. Practice stress management techniques, ensure you’re getting enough rest, and engage in activities that bring you joy and relaxation.
Remember, you are important. Prioritizing self-care ensures that you have the mental and emotional strength to navigate challenging situations effectively.
Final thoughts
Leadership styles vary greatly, and sometimes, we find ourselves under the guidance of a leader who isn’t willing to hear anyone’s opinions but their own. It can be a challenge, but remember, every situation offers an opportunity for growth.
The American psychologist Carl R. Rogers once said, “The only person who is educated is the one who has learned how to learn and change.” This quote beautifully captures the essence of our journey when dealing with such leaders.
Change might not always come from the leader, but it doesn’t mean that we can’t grow and learn from the situation. Each of these strategies we’ve discussed here is not only about dealing with a stubborn leader but also about self-growth and emotional intelligence.
So, as you navigate through these challenging situations, remember to stay patient, empathetic, and most importantly, always prioritize self-care. These experiences will shape you into a more resilient and understanding individual, better prepared to face any leadership style in the future.
