8 steps to build the mental strength you will need when life gets tough

Life comes with its fair share of challenges. It’s not all sunshine and roses, but that doesn’t mean we can’t be prepared.

Building mental strength is like building physical strength. You don’t suddenly wake up one day with biceps of steel – it takes time and consistent effort.

The same goes for mental strength. It’s not about never feeling afraid or overwhelmed. It’s about knowing how to handle those feelings when they come.

Through this article, I’ll walk you through eight practical steps to build the mental resilience you’ll need for when life gets tough. Trust me, these steps aren’t rocket science but they can make a world of difference when you’re in the thick of it.

So let’s dive right in, shall we?

1) Self-awareness

A critical starting point in building mental strength is developing a robust sense of self-awareness.

It sounds easy on paper, but being truly self-aware requires considerable introspection and honesty. It’s about understanding your emotions, your reactions, and your triggers.

The key is not to judge yourself harshly during this process. It’s not about labeling your responses as ‘right’ or ‘wrong’. Instead, it’s about identifying patterns and understanding why you react the way you do.

For example, if you get anxious before a big presentation, don’t just brush it off as ‘stage fright’. Try to dig deeper. Is it fear of judgment? Is it a lack of preparation? The more you understand about yourself, the better equipped you’ll be to handle tough situations.

Remember, self-awareness is not a destination but a journey. The more you know about yourself, the stronger your mental resilience will become.

And as you continue on this journey of self-discovery, be kind to yourself. We’re all works in progress.

2) Practice gratitude

I can’t stress the importance of this enough – practicing gratitude has been a game-changer for me.

Life can be overwhelming, and there are days when it feels like everything is going wrong. On those days, practicing gratitude helps me shift my focus from what’s going wrong to what’s going right.

Let me share an example. A while back, I was dealing with a particularly challenging project at work. It felt like everything that could go wrong, was going wrong. It was easy to be swept up in the chaos and negativity.

So, every night before bed, I began to write down three things I was grateful for that day. Sometimes they were big things – like a problem at work getting resolved. But most of the time, they were small – like having a good cup of coffee, or a phone call with an old friend.

Over time, this simple practice helped change my perspective. It helped me see that even on the hardest days, there was always something to be grateful for.

Practicing gratitude doesn’t mean ignoring the tough stuff. But it can help build your mental strength by reminding you of the positive aspects in your life. And trust me, there’s always something to be grateful for.

3) Embrace change

Change is a fundamental part of life. It’s happening all around us, all the time. Even our bodies are in a constant state of change – did you know that 98% of the atoms in your body are replaced every year?

Yet, despite its inevitability, many of us resist change. We cling to the familiar, even when it’s not serving us well. But here’s the thing: resisting change is like trying to swim against a powerful current – it’s exhausting and ultimately futile.

Building mental strength involves learning to embrace change instead of resisting it. This doesn’t mean you have to love every change that comes your way. But accepting that change is a part of life can make it easier to navigate.

So the next time you’re faced with a significant change, instead of digging in your heels, try going with the flow. You might be surprised at where it leads you.

4) Set healthy boundaries

Another crucial step in building mental strength is learning to set healthy boundaries. This is about understanding where you end and where others begin.

Healthy boundaries can protect your self-esteem and maintain your self-respect. They can prevent others from taking advantage of you or from infringing on your personal space and time.

Setting boundaries doesn’t mean isolating yourself or being unkind. It’s about recognizing your worth and ensuring others do too.

Remember, you have a right to say ‘no’ without feeling guilty. You have a right to prioritize your needs without feeling selfish. And you have a right to protect your energy without feeling rude.

Healthy boundaries can help create a balance in your life, reduce stress, and ultimately contribute to your mental strength.

5) Cultivate self-compassion

In our journey of building mental strength, it’s easy to become our own harshest critic. We push ourselves, set high standards, and then beat ourselves up when we fall short.

But let me tell you this: self-compassion is not a luxury; it’s a necessity. It’s about treating yourself with the same kindness and understanding that you’d extend to a friend in a similar situation.

When we stumble, it’s important to remember that everyone makes mistakes. It’s part of being human. Instead of berating yourself, try acknowledging the pain and treating yourself with kindness.

Cultivating self-compassion doesn’t mean ignoring your shortcomings or shying away from personal growth. It’s about acknowledging that you’re a work in progress and that it’s okay to not be perfect.

In the face of adversity, a little self-compassion can go a long way in building resilience and mental strength. So be kind to yourself – you’re doing the best you can with what you have.

6) Practice mindfulness

I was never one for meditation or mindfulness. It sounded too woo-woo, and I couldn’t sit still for more than a few minutes without my mind wandering off. But then, life threw a curveball, and everything changed.

Without going into too much detail, let’s just say it was a challenging time. Amidst the chaos, I decided to give mindfulness a shot. And I was surprised by the results.

Mindfulness is about being present in the moment, without judgment. It’s about observing your thoughts and feelings without getting swept up in them.

It was hard at first – my mind would drift off, and I’d get frustrated. But with practice, it got easier. I learned to accept my wandering mind as part of the process.

Practicing mindfulness helped me create a space between my thoughts and my reactions. No longer was I at the mercy of my thoughts – I could choose how to respond to them. And that, my friend, is a powerful tool for building mental strength.

So if you’re like I was, skeptical about mindfulness, give it a try. You might just be surprised by the results like I was.

7) Foster healthy relationships

A crucial aspect of building mental strength often overlooked is the importance of fostering healthy relationships. We’re social creatures by nature, and our relationships can have a significant impact on our mental well-being.

Healthy relationships are those that add value to your life. They’re the ones where you feel heard, respected, and appreciated. They’re the ones where there’s a balance of give-and-take.

On the other hand, toxic relationships can drain your energy and undermine your mental strength. They’re characterized by negativity, disrespect, and a lack of support.

It’s essential to surround yourself with people who lift you up rather than bring you down. Cultivate relationships with individuals who respect your boundaries, support your goals, and appreciate you for who you are.

Remember, quality trumps quantity when it comes to relationships. It’s better to have a few meaningful connections than numerous superficial ones.

8) Keep moving forward

Building mental strength isn’t a linear process. There will be setbacks, there will be victories, and there will be moments when you question your progress. But the most important thing to remember is to keep moving forward.

Growth happens outside our comfort zone. So, even when it gets tough, especially when it gets tough, don’t give up. Keep pushing, keep learning, and keep growing.

The journey of building mental strength is a marathon, not a sprint. It takes time and patience. But trust me, every step forward, no matter how small, is a step in the right direction. And every step counts.

Final thoughts: It’s all about resilience

The journey of building mental strength is deeply intertwined with our inherent capacity for resilience.

Resilience, in the face of adversity, is that indomitable spirit within us that refuses to back down. It’s the unyielding belief that we can withstand the storm, learn from it, and come out stronger on the other side.

Psychologists define resilience as the process of adapting well in the face of adversity, trauma, tragedy, threats, or significant sources of stress. It’s not just about bouncing back from these difficult experiences, but using them as catalysts for growth.

Like a tree bending in the wind, resilience is about flexing and adapting. It’s about standing tall despite the gales of life that threaten to uproot us.

As we navigate through the winding path of building mental strength, let’s remember that it’s our resilience that fuels this journey. It’s our resilience that stitches our wounds and drives us forward. And it’s our resilience that transforms our trials into triumphs.

Building mental strength isn’t a destination; it’s a journey. A journey punctuated by setbacks and victories, tears and laughter, pain and growth. And through it all, it’s our resilience that lights the way.

So let’s keep moving forward, one step at a time, building not just our mental strength but also fostering our inherent resilience. Because at the end of the day, it’s not just about weathering the storm, but learning to dance in the rain.

Picture of Isabelle Chase

Isabelle Chase

Isabella Chase, a New York City native, writes about the complexities of modern life and relationships. Her articles draw from her experiences navigating the vibrant and diverse social landscape of the city. Isabella’s insights are about finding harmony in the chaos and building strong, authentic connections in a fast-paced world.

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