Ever catch yourself wondering if you’ve truly hit the jackpot in the relationship department?
It’s a natural thought—but relationships can be complicated, and it’s not always easy to tell if you’re with someone who’s genuinely one of the good ones.
But let me tell you, certain behaviors set a quality human being apart from the rest.
As someone who’s spent years unraveling the dynamics of love and partnership, I’m here to help you spot these golden traits. Today, we’re diving into some key behaviors that reveal you’re with someone exceptional.
Ready to celebrate your amazing partner—or figure out what to look for in the future? Let’s get into it!
1) They value your perspective
Now, this isn’t just about nodding along when you’re sharing your thoughts or feelings.
It’s about how they engage with what you’re saying.
They don’t just hear you out, they listen actively, and respond to your feelings or ideas in a thoughtful manner.
Good human beings understand that everyone’s perspective is valuable and unique.
They make an effort to see the world from your point of view and appreciate the insights it provides. They respect your opinions, even when they disagree with them.
This kind of open-mindedness is a hallmark of emotional maturity and a sign that you’re with someone who truly values you for who you are.
2) They aren’t afraid to apologize
We all make mistakes, it’s part of being human.
But what sets a good person (and partner) apart is their ability to recognize their errors, take responsibility for them, and make amends.
Apologies can be hard. Admitting you’re wrong can bruise your ego.
But a person of quality understands that being right isn’t as important as being fair and maintaining a healthy relationship.
If your partner is quick to say “I’m sorry” when they’re in the wrong, and they take steps to correct their mistake, then you’re definitely with someone who values honesty, humility, and respect.
3) They allow you to be independent
This is such a big one that is often overlooked.
For a relationship to thrive, both partners need to maintain their individuality and independence.
In my book Breaking The Attachment: How To Overcome Codependency in Your Relationship, I delve into the importance of establishing and maintaining personal boundaries.
But for now, just know that good partners understand and respect these boundaries.
They encourage you to pursue your passions and interests, spend time with friends and family, and continue growing as an individual.
They know that a relationship is about complementing each other, not consuming one another…that you’re two separate individuals who’ve chosen to walk together, not two halves that make a whole.
4) They are kind, even when no one is watching
Have you ever noticed your partner showing kindness without any expectation of recognition or reward?
It’s in the little things—how they treat a server at a restaurant, the patience they show to a stranger, or the way they care for someone who can’t offer them anything in return.
True kindness isn’t performative; it’s woven into their character and shows up even when there’s no one around to applaud it.
When you’re with someone who embodies this quiet compassion, you can trust that their heart is in the right place.
It’s a sign they’ll approach your relationship with the same grace and generosity, creating a foundation of warmth and respect that’s built to last.
5) They communicate effectively
I’ve said this before but I’ll say it again, communication is the lifeblood of any relationship.
It’s how we express our needs, desires, and concerns to one another.
I’ve seen many relationships crumble due to a lack of effective communication because when communication breaks down, misunderstandings, resentment, and unmet expectations can take over.
But what do I mean by communicating effectively?
Well, a partner who communicates effectively doesn’t just talk—they ensure their words are clear, respectful, and honest.
They express their feelings without resorting to blame or hostility and are equally committed to listening to you with an open mind and heart.
They’re willing to have tough conversations, not to win an argument, but to strengthen the relationship.
They don’t avoid conflict but instead address it calmly and constructively, focusing on solutions rather than problems.
When you’re with someone who prioritizes healthy communication, you feel heard, understood, and valued.
That’s the kind of connection that keeps a relationship thriving.
6) They aren’t afraid to be vulnerable
This one might sound odd here, but it’s actually one of the most important.
As renowned researcher and author Brené Brown puts it, “Vulnerability is the birthplace of love, belonging, joy, courage, empathy, and creativity. It is the source of hope, empathy, accountability, and authenticity.”
Vulnerability requires courage, and when someone is willing to open up to you, it shows that they value emotional intimacy over maintaining a facade.
A partner who allows themselves to be vulnerable with you is someone who trusts you deeply.
They’re not afraid to share their fears, insecurities, or dreams, even if it means taking an emotional risk.
This kind of authenticity fosters connection and makes your relationship a safe space for both of you to be your truest selves.
7) They support your growth
Last but not least, a truly exceptional partner doesn’t just accept who you are—they actively encourage you to grow into the best version of yourself.
They cheer for your successes and stand by you during setbacks.
Whether it’s pursuing a career goal, picking up a new hobby, or working on personal development, they’re there to celebrate your wins and motivate you when the road gets tough.
Importantly, they support your growth without feeling threatened by it.
They understand that your achievements don’t diminish the relationship—they enhance it.
This kind of support shows that they’re invested in your happiness and fulfillment, not just their own.
When you’re with someone who genuinely wants to see you thrive, it’s a clear sign you’re in a relationship with a remarkable human being.
Final thoughts
I hope these insights have been helpful to you.
To delve deeper into these ideas and explore more about personal growth and relationships, I recommend this video by Justin Brown where he explores the complexities of finding a life partner.
It’s a thoughtful reflection on shared values, growth, and mutual support in a relationship.
Here’s to learning, growing, and evolving together. Keep going!
