In all my reflections on relationships, there’s one pattern I keep stumbling across—a quiet, unsettling truth that’s hard to ignore.
It’s about women who lose themselves, often without even realizing it, by becoming overly submissive in their relationships. It’s not always obvious; it’s not just about saying “yes” to everything or staying silent.
Sometimes, it’s tucked into the small, everyday choices—compromises that start to feel like second nature.
This kind of behavior often creeps in so subtly that it’s hard to spot, let alone address. But when you look closely, there are seven recurring habits that seem to tell the same story.
Recognizing these patterns isn’t about judgment—it’s about awareness. And that awareness can be the spark to redefine what healthy, balanced love looks like.
1) Compromising self-worth for peacekeeping
Maintaining harmony in relationships is important, but not at the cost of compromising one’s self-worth.
Overly submissive women often find themselves continually yielding to their partner’s desires, even when it opposes their own values.
This behavior often stems from an underlying fear of conflict. The fear is so intense that they’d rather suppress their needs than risk an argument.
They may convince themselves that being selfless is noble, yet in reality, they’re negating their own worth. Silencing your inner voice for the sake of peace isn’t an act of love, it’s a sacrifice of your authenticity.
Respect in a relationship is two-sided. Your opinions and feelings matter just as much as your partner’s.
You owe it to yourself to express what you feel and stand up for what you believe in. Don’t compromise your self-worth for peacekeeping.
Assert your needs without fear. It’s your right.
2) Acceptance of disrespectful behavior
Another common trait I’ve observed in overly submissive women is their tolerance for disrespectful behavior.
This can range from subtle forms of disregard to more overt acts of disrespect.
Why does this happen?
It’s often due to a deep-seated belief that they don’t deserve better or that they must endure such behavior to keep the relationship going.
Over time, this acceptance becomes a norm, a toxic cycle difficult to break.
Research indicates that women may develop benevolently sexist attitudes as a response to experiencing sexism themselves, internalizing these beliefs as a protective mechanism.
But here’s the truth: No one deserves disrespect.
And no relationship is worth the cost of your dignity.
In the words of Maya Angelou, a woman who held a firm belief in self-respect and dignity, “Never make someone a priority when all you are to them is an option.”
This quote serves as a reminder that you deserve respect and reciprocity in your relationships.
Don’t settle for less.
3) Ignoring opportunities for personal growth
In relationships, overly submissive women often overlook opportunities for personal growth.
They become so focused on their partner’s needs and desires that they neglect their own development.
One crucial element of personal growth is understanding that the way we relate to others often mirrors how we relate to ourselves.
This is a key aspect I collaborated on in the creation of a free masterclass, “The Art of Love and Intimacy”, led by the shaman Rudá Iandê.
This masterclass challenges societal norms around love and intimacy, promoting self-empowerment and emotional independence.
It provides practical insights that empower you to transform your relationships and personal growth.
By recognizing that your relationships reflect your inner world, you can take proactive steps to improve both your internal and external connections.
Breaking free from toxic relationship cycles and limiting beliefs is a transformative journey that this masterclass can guide you through.
Don’t allow yourself to be trapped in a relationship that stunts your growth.
Seize the opportunity to learn, evolve, and forge deeper, more meaningful connections.
Check out the masterclass today. It’s time to put yourself back in control of your personal development.
4) Neglecting self-care and personal needs
In the quest to keep their partners happy, overly submissive women often neglect their own needs.
This can be as basic as self-care routines, hobbies, or personal passions.
They put themselves last, sacrificing their well-being for the sake of the relationship.
This behavior is not only unfair but also unsustainable. It leads to burnout, resentment, and a loss of personal identity.
It’s like trying to fill someone else’s cup while yours is empty – it simply doesn’t work in the long run. You must remember that you deserve time and space for yourself.
Your needs and desires are valid and important. Self-care isn’t selfish; it’s essential for your overall well-being and the health of your relationships.
Reflect on this: Are you neglecting your personal needs in your relationship?
If so, isn’t it time to put yourself first?
5) Avoiding confrontation at all costs
Overly submissive women tend to avoid confrontation.
They believe that any form of conflict is a threat to the relationship.
But here’s the truth: conflict, when handled with mutual respect and empathy, can be a catalyst for growth and understanding.
Avoiding confrontation means avoiding tough conversations that could potentially resolve underlying issues.
It’s an act of denial that ultimately suppresses honesty and authenticity.
Research indicates that conflict avoidance often harms relationships by allowing issues to fester and grow, leading to decreased satisfaction and increased resentment.
In relationships, it’s essential to engage in healthy debates, voice disagreements, and resolve conflicts constructively.
This aligns with the belief that every challenge we face is an opportunity to tap into our creative potential and find innovative solutions.
The path to a healthy relationship isn’t always smooth.
It involves navigating through rough terrains of disagreements and conflicts.
Authenticity thrives where there’s room for honesty, even when it’s uncomfortable.
6) Living in constant fear of loss
Another behavior commonly displayed by overly submissive women in relationships is living in a constant state of fear – fear of losing their partner, fear of being alone, or fear of change.
This fear often leads them to tolerate behaviors that they otherwise wouldn’t.
Fear, while a natural human emotion, can be crippling when it controls our lives.
It prevents us from making rational decisions and traps us in unhealthy cycles.
Overcoming this fear requires courage and self-awareness. It involves confronting our limiting beliefs and recognizing our worth.
In a relationship, it’s important to understand that love does not thrive in fear.
Authentic love is based on mutual respect and freedom, not insecurity and control.
If you find yourself living in constant fear within your relationship, it may be time to reassess and challenge these fears.
7) Suppressing personal ambitions
The last behavior I want to highlight is the suppression of personal ambitions.
Overly submissive women often sideline their dreams and aspirations for the sake of their partners.
They put their life goals on hold, believing that it’s their duty to fully devote themselves to their partners.
But this belief couldn’t be more misguided.
Each individual has the right to pursue their dreams and live a fulfilling life.
Your relationship should inspire and support your personal growth, not hinder it.
Research indicates that women may diminish their labor outcomes to maintain traditional gender roles within the household, often reducing their earnings to preserve their partner’s status as the primary breadwinner.
You are more than just a supporting role in someone else’s story. You have your own dreams to chase, your own story to write.
Don’t suppress your ambitions for the sake of a relationship. Your dreams matter, and they are worth pursuing.
Embracing authenticity and self-worth
In this article, we’ve shed light on the behaviors that overly submissive women often display in relationships — behaviors that often stem from fear, a lack of self-worth, and a misguided understanding of love.
We’ve underscored the importance of personal growth, self-respect, and the courage to assert one’s needs and desires.
These behaviors, while challenging to address, are not unchangeable.
By recognizing and confronting them, one can begin the journey towards healthier, more balanced relationships.
This journey requires authenticity, courage, and the willingness to challenge societal norms.
For those ready to further explore these principles and apply them to their personal development and relationships, I highly recommend taking Rudá Iandê’s free “The Art of Love and Intimacy” masterclass.
This masterclass offers a transformative approach to relationships, dismantling the myth of the perfect partner and ideal relationship.
It encourages you to embrace your present circumstances to significantly improve your connections.
The masterclass provides you with valuable tools and insights to cultivate deeper, more meaningful relationships.
It teaches you to break free from toxic relationship cycles and limiting beliefs to create fulfilling and authentic connections.
Navigating through these challenges is part of the journey towards healthier relationships and personal growth.
Embrace it as an opportunity to learn, grow, and evolve.
Remember, your worth is not defined by your relationship status. You deserve respect, love, and fulfillment in all areas of life.
Take the first step towards a healthier relationship dynamic by watching Rudá Iandê’s free “The Art of Love and Intimacy” masterclass.
Begin your journey towards authentic love and self-growth today.
