8 signs you’re too nice for your own wellbeing, according to psychology

If you’re the kind of person who always puts others before yourself, you might be too nice for your own good. And trust me, I’ve been there.

Being overly nice can leave you feeling overwhelmed, unappreciated, and even taken advantage of. It can be tiring, leaving you frazzled and feeling a bit under the weather.

Now, don’t get me wrong. Kindness is a wonderful trait. But there’s a fine line between being kind and being too nice. Crossing that line can affect your wellbeing.

Psychology has a lot to say about this. So, let’s dive in.

This is your introduction to “8 signs you’re too nice for your own wellbeing, according to psychology”. We’ll unpack what it means to be too nice and how it can impact you.

Trust me, understanding these signs could be a game-changer!

1) You’re always putting others first

We all know the saying, “put on your own oxygen mask before assisting others.”

But if you’re someone who’s too nice, you might find yourself constantly sacrificing your own needs for the sake of others.

You might think this is just being considerate or kind-hearted. But there’s a stark difference between being empathetic and completely sidelining your own needs and wants.

If you’re constantly putting others first at the expense of your own wellbeing, you might be too nice for your own good.

Psychology tells us that self-care isn’t selfish. It’s necessary for our mental health. But when you’re too nice, you may struggle with this concept.

You might feel guilty or selfish about prioritizing yourself. This guilt is a red flag that you might be too nice for your own wellbeing.

Recognizing this sign is the first step towards creating healthier boundaries. Remember, it’s okay to put yourself first sometimes. It’s not just okay, it’s essential.

2) You struggle to say no

No is a powerful word, and it’s one that many of us struggle to use. Especially if you’re overly nice, you might find it incredibly difficult to say no, even when you absolutely should.

Saying yes to every request or favor can leave you feeling overwhelmed and stressed.

You may find yourself spread too thin, trying to meet everyone else’s expectations while neglecting your own needs.

While you might think saying yes is the polite or kind thing to do, psychology tells us that it can actually be detrimental to your wellbeing.

Learning to say no isn’t about being unkind or selfish. It’s about respecting your own time and energy.

If you find saying no a challenge, it could be a sign that you’re too nice for your own wellbeing.

3) You feel responsible for others’ happiness

When you’re overly nice, you might find yourself taking on the burdens of others, even if it’s at the cost of your own happiness.

You may feel like it’s your job to make everyone else happy, and when they’re not, you blame yourself.

Feeling responsible for others’ happiness is not only exhausting but also unrealistic. Happiness is a personal emotion that each individual is in charge of for themselves.

People who feel overly responsible for others’ emotions can experience high levels of stress, anxiety, and even burnout.

If you often find yourself in this position, it could be a clear sign that you’re too nice for your own good.

We can support and care for others, but we can’t control their emotions or make them happy. That’s up to them.

4) You often feel taken for granted

Isn’t it heartbreaking when you go out of your way for others, and it seems like they barely notice? That’s a feeling many overly nice people know all too well.

Feeling unappreciated or taken for granted isn’t a reflection on your worth or the sincerity of your actions.

It’s more about the fact that people may have become accustomed to your constant giving.

You deserve recognition and appreciation for your actions, just like anyone else.

If you’re often feeling undervalued despite your efforts, it might be a sign that you’re being too nice.

It’s important to remember that it’s okay to expect appreciation and to voice it when you feel overlooked. You matter, and so do your feelings.

5) You rarely voice your own needs

Ever found yourself biting your tongue, holding back your own opinions or needs because you didn’t want to be a burden? That’s a common experience for those who are too nice.

You might think it’s easier to keep quiet than to risk upsetting someone else.

But in the long run, suppressing your own needs can lead to resentment and even impact your emotional health.

Everyone has needs and wants, and voicing them isn’t being demanding or selfish. It’s a fundamental part of human communication and relationships.

If you’re constantly downplaying your own needs, it could be a sign that you’re being too nice at the expense of your own wellbeing. Remember, your views and needs are just as important as anyone else’s.

6) You’re always the ‘go-to’ person

There was a time when I found myself constantly being the ‘go-to’ person for everyone around me. Need a last-minute babysitter? I was there.

Someone to vent to at 3 a.m.? I was the one picking up the phone. Even when I was swamped with my own tasks, I found it hard to say no.

Being the reliable ‘go-to’ person might make you feel needed and valued.

But if you’re always the one people turn to, especially in emergencies or at their convenience, it could be an indicator that you’re too nice for your own good.

While it’s great to be reliable and helpful, if it’s causing you stress or leaving you with little time for yourself, it might be time to reassess your boundaries.

It’s okay to say no and prioritize your own needs and wellbeing.

7) You tolerate poor treatment

Listen up, because this is important. If you’re finding yourself regularly brushing off disrespectful or poor treatment from others, we’ve got a problem.

Being nice doesn’t mean you should be a doormat. You deserve to be treated with respect and kindness, just like everyone else.

If you’re tolerating less than decent behavior simply because you don’t want to upset the other person or cause a fuss, then that’s a glaring sign you’re too nice for your own good.

It’s time to stand up for yourself. Set your boundaries, demand respect and don’t settle for anything less. You’re worth it.

8) You forget to take care of yourself

In all your efforts to be there for others, make them happy, and keep the peace, there’s a vital person you might be forgetting – yourself.

Self-care isn’t a luxury, it’s a necessity. You can’t pour from an empty cup.

If you’re so focused on others that you neglect your own physical or emotional needs, that’s a surefire sign you’re too nice for your own good.

Take time for yourself. Prioritize your needs. Practice self-care.

It’s not selfish; it’s essential. Remember, being kind to others starts with being kind to yourself.

Conclusion

Being kind and caring is a beautiful trait—it’s something to be celebrated. But it’s equally important to remember that your wellbeing matters too.

This article has shared signs that you might be too nice for your own good. It’s not about making you feel guilty or encouraging you to stop being kind.

Rather, it’s about helping you recognize when kindness might be tipping into self-sacrifice.

The choice, ultimately, is yours. You can choose to set boundaries, to say no when needed, and to prioritize your own wellbeing. It’s not selfish—it’s essential.

Time spent caring for yourself is never wasted. And being truly kind means being kind to yourself as well.

So here’s to embracing kindness—the kind that includes you too!

Picture of Ava Sinclair

Ava Sinclair

Ava Sinclair is a former competitive athlete who transitioned into the world of wellness and mindfulness. Her journey through the highs and lows of competitive sports has given her a unique perspective on resilience and mental toughness. Ava’s writing reflects her belief in the power of small, daily habits to create lasting change.

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