We’re always on the lookout to add things to our lives in the name of happiness—more money, more achievements, more good habits. But what if real happiness isn’t about adding more, but letting go?
Sometimes, it is.
Often, we hold onto subtle habits and ways of thinking that quietly drain our joy. In this article, we’ll explore seven such habits that might be standing in the way of your happiness.
Let’s dive in.
1) Clinging to the past
Living in the past, be it a golden era or a time of struggle, can prevent us from truly experiencing happiness in the now. Every moment spent ruminating over past events is a moment lost from our present life.
When we let go of these old stories and memories, we create space for new experiences and joy. It’s not about forgetting our past, but about not allowing it to dictate our present and future.
In the wise words of renowned psychologist Carl Jung, “I am not what happened to me, I am what I choose to become.” So let’s choose happiness, shall we?
2) Overcomplicating life
In my journey as the founder of Hack Spirit and a mindfulness enthusiast, I’ve learned one thing very clearly: simplicity breeds happiness.
I used to cram my day with meetings, tasks and deadlines. I was always on the go, never pausing to breathe or enjoy the moment. My life was filled with stress and chaos, leaving me feeling constantly drained.
Then one day, I realized that I was overcomplicating my life. I took a step back and started simplifying things. I started saying no to unnecessary commitments, decluttered my workspace, and began practicing mindfulness regularly.
This shift towards simplicity has brought a profound sense of peace and happiness into my life. Trust me, sometimes, less truly is more.
3) Letting ego rule
This is a huge one.
Our ego so often becomes the greatest barrier to our happiness. It can lead to unnecessary conflict, inflated sense of self-importance, and a lack of empathy towards others.
Now, don’t get me wrong. A healthy sense of self is crucial, but it’s when our ego starts to take the driver’s seat that problems arise.
In my book, Hidden Secrets of Buddhism: How To Live With Maximum Impact and Minimum Ego, I delve into this topic in detail. I discuss how we can cultivate humility and let go of our ego-centric behaviors that often stand in the way of inner peace and happiness.
For now, though, just know that learning to step away from ego-dominated actions, we can usher in a more compassionate, understanding and happy self.
4) Neglecting self-care
When was the last time you took a moment just for yourself?
In the constant hustle of daily life, self-care often falls by the wayside. It’s something we plan to get around to when we have the time—but that time rarely, if ever, comes.
And that’s a big mistake.
Experts, including those at Psych Central, emphasize that a lack of self-care can lead to a range of negative consequences, from feeling hopeless and burned out to a decline in work performance and worsening mental health symptoms like anxiety or depression.
But what exactly do we mean by self-care?
Well, for me, it’s setting aside time for mindfulness, reading a good book, or taking a quiet walk to reconnect with myself. For you, it might be something entirely different—a hobby, exercise, or simply resting.
The important thing is to treat self-care like any other commitment. Schedule it, prioritize it, and make it non-negotiable.
5) Chasing after happiness
Now, this might sound counter-intuitive, but hear me out.
The pursuit of happiness can often make us overlook the joy that’s already present in our lives. We’re so busy chasing the next big thing, the next high, that we forget to appreciate what we already have.
Instead of constantly seeking, try to cultivate an attitude of gratitude. As so well put by author Melody Beattie “Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more.”
You might be surprised how much happiness you’ll find in the simple things you already have.
6) Constant comparison
We live in an age of social media where it’s easy to scroll through feeds and compare our lives with others. However, this constant comparison can lead to feelings of inadequacy and dissatisfaction, robbing us of our happiness.
Each one of us is on a unique journey with different experiences, skills, and strengths. Comparing our chapter 2 to someone else’s chapter 20 doesn’t make sense and only serves to bring us down.
Instead, as advised by psychologist Dr Jordan Peterson, “Compare yourself to who you were yesterday, not to who someone else is today.” Celebrate your small victories and appreciate your own journey.
7) Avoiding discomfort
Life isn’t always comfortable. There are moments of pain, challenge, and discomfort. But these moments are often where real growth happens.
I remember a time when I was afraid to step out of my comfort zone. I stuck to what was familiar, even if it wasn’t particularly fulfilling. It was only when I started embracing discomfort and taking risks that I truly began to grow and find happiness.
Discomfort can be a sign that you’re pushing your boundaries and growing as a person. So don’t shy away from it. Embrace it, learn from it, and let it guide you towards a more fulfilling and happy life.
Final thoughts: Happiness is a journey, not a destination
The pursuit of happiness is a continuous journey, and it’s important to remember that it’s not about reaching a specific point or achieving a certain goal. It’s about how we approach and live our lives on a daily basis.
Letting go of these habits we discussed can be a challenging yet rewarding step towards rediscovering your happiness. It’s about creating space for joy, peace, and contentment to flourish in your life.
In my book, Hidden Secrets of Buddhism: How To Live With Maximum Impact and Minimum Ego, I explore these themes in more depth. It might be a helpful guide as you navigate this path towards greater happiness.
As always, I hope you found some value and inspiration in this post. Here’s to your journey towards true happiness!
