I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve wondered whether I’m doing this whole parenting thing “right.”
On the days when the laundry seems endless and the kids ask a million questions before breakfast, it’s easy to slip into self-doubt.
But here’s what I’ve realized: we parents often underestimate the good we’re already doing.
I’ve heard countless friends and coaching clients talk about their parental “failings,” only to discover they’re showing up for their kids in the most incredible ways—ways that speak volumes about their dedication and love.
If you’ve ever felt that twinge of uncertainty, let me assure you: you’re likely doing so much better than you think.
Below, I’ll share seven actions that may seem simple on the surface, yet they’re powerful indicators that you’re more supportive, understanding, and nurturing than you give yourself credit for.
As you read, I hope you’ll find yourself saying, “Yes, I do that!”—because you deserve to recognize and celebrate your strengths.
1. You actively listen to your child
Have you ever paused what you were doing just to hear your child explain their latest drawing or story idea?
Active listening doesn’t require grand gestures—sometimes, it’s as simple as maintaining eye contact and nodding along to show you’re present.
According to many child development experts, kids who feel heard are more likely to develop confidence in sharing their thoughts and feelings.
By letting your child know you genuinely care about what they have to say, you’re building a foundation of trust that can last a lifetime.
To make active listening a habit, I started putting my phone away during “talk time.” Whether it’s a conversation over dinner or in the car, giving my kids undivided attention has done wonders for our bond.
One thing I’ve tried is asking follow-up questions—like, “What happened next?”—rather than jumping to give advice.
This small shift helps my children feel validated and respected. If you’re doing this already, give yourself a silent gold star.
2. You create routines and boundaries
In our home, my wife and I have established a predictable bedtime routine—bath, pajamas, story, sleep.
Sure, there are nights when everything goes off the rails (like when my daughter decides she needs an elaborate pillow fort at 8 p.m.), but having a set rhythm helps everyone know what to expect.
Research shows that children thrive on predictability because it gives them a sense of security.
If you consistently keep bedtime at roughly the same hour or have rules about when screens go off, you’re already setting boundaries that help your child feel safe and grounded.
I like to think of routines and boundaries as invisible frameworks that let kids explore the world without getting lost.
It’s not about micromanaging every aspect of their life, but rather ensuring they have a comforting structure.
If you’re worried you’re being too strict, remember that a little consistency can be the comforting hug your child needs after a chaotic day.
3. You apologize when you make mistakes
Apologies are terribly hard to do, aren’t they? And as parents, we often fall into the trap of thinking, nah, I don’t have to do that.
But apologizing to our kids when we make mistakes is actually one of the wisest moves we could ever make.
Why?
Because it teaches them two important things: responsibility and empathy.
According to the team at As They Grow, modeling the act of apologizing shows kids that everyone slips up sometimes, and what truly matters is how we handle those mistakes.
If you’ve ever knelt down to your child’s eye level and said, “I shouldn’t have shouted, and I’m sorry,” then you’re teaching them to own their actions in the most respectful way possible.
It’s a lesson that no lecture could ever fully convey—and it shows you value their feelings just as much as you value your own.
4. You encourage independence
I remember the first time I let my son pour his own cereal. It was equal parts empowering and nerve-wracking. Would he spill the milk? Would he remember to shut the fridge door?
But letting kids try things on their own is one of the best ways to nurture their self-confidence.
Whether they’re learning to tie their shoes or pack their school lunch, giving them the space to figure it out sends the message, “I believe you can do this.”
Encouraging independence also frees you up to cheer from the sidelines.
Even if a few dribbles of milk find their way onto the kitchen counter, the skill—and self-trust—your child gains from that small act of responsibility is priceless.
If you regularly look for ways to help them grow more self-sufficient, you’re equipping them with lifelong tools for problem-solving and confidence-building.
5. You show affection in meaningful ways
Hugs, high-fives, a warm smile—these seemingly little acts can reassure your child that they’re loved, welcomed, and safe.
I try to greet my kids with a big hug when they come home from school. It’s a short ritual, but it tells them they’re a priority in my life.
I still remember how safe I felt when my own mom would tuck me in at night, so I make an effort to recreate that sense of warmth for my kids.
Sometimes, a quick “I love you” or a playful wink is all it takes to remind your child you’re in their corner.
If you’re not a big “hugger,” that’s okay. Affection can be a gentle pat on the back when they do well, a smile of encouragement when they’re nervous, or simply sitting close by as they chat about their day.
These mini-connections might feel ordinary, but they’re often the bright spots your child will recall years down the road.
6. You celebrate small victories
When my daughter first learned to ride her bike without training wheels, we threw a spontaneous “ride around the block” party—complete with cheers and a ridiculous victory dance.
It wasn’t about making a huge deal out of every milestone, but rather acknowledging her effort and bravery.
Kids need to see that growth doesn’t only come from monumental achievements; sometimes, it’s the small steps that build their resilience and self-esteem.
Even something as simple as praising your child’s attempt to try a new vegetable can reinforce a positive mindset.
Celebrations don’t have to be extravagant. A proud smile, a high-five, or a “You did it!” can pack a punch.
If you’re already the type of parent who gives supportive feedback or occasionally bakes a batch of cookies after a test your child studied hard for, then you’re showing them that progress—no matter how small—is worth applauding.
7. You prioritize emotional well-being
One thing I’ve noticed with my own kids is that they need just as much guidance in handling emotions as they do in learning math or reading.
By encouraging them to name their feelings (“Are you feeling sad, frustrated, or worried?”) and discussing healthy ways to cope, you’re giving them tools to navigate the ups and downs of life.
Experts at the American Psychological Association suggest that emotional literacy is a critical factor in building resilience. When you teach your child to identify what they feel and why, you’re nurturing both self-awareness and empathy.
A quick check-in—like asking, “How are you feeling today?”—can open the door to genuine conversations that strengthen your bond.
In my family, we sometimes do a “feelings round-up” at dinner, where everyone shares a highlight and a challenge from the day. It may sound simple, but it’s amazing how it encourages openness.
If you do anything that helps your child feel emotionally safe—like validating their tears or giving them room to calm down when they’re upset—you’re absolutely fostering a healthy emotional environment.
Conclusion
Being a parent doesn’t come with a certificate of completion, and there’s no universal checklist that guarantees perfection.
Instead, it’s those everyday efforts—like listening deeply, setting thoughtful boundaries, apologizing sincerely, and cheering for small victories—that shape the loving space your children call home.
So, if you do these seven things, give yourself some well-deserved recognition.
You’re guiding your child through life with empathy and dedication, even on those days when everything feels chaotic.
Believe in your own strengths: you’re paving the way for your child to become a confident, resilient individual, and they’re fortunate to have you in their corner.
Embrace your worthiness as a parent—it’s often greater than you realize.
