Owning your own story is about embracing your past, accepting your present, and setting your sights on the future. It’s about acknowledging that you are the author of your own life.
But how do you know you’re starting to claim your narrative? There are some telltale signs that give it away.
In this article, I’m going to walk you through 8 signs that you’re beginning to own your story. And trust me, it matters more than you might think.
Because when you own your story, you own your life. Stick around and I’ll explain why.
1) You’re embracing your past
One of the first signs that you’re owning your story is when you start embracing your past.
It’s not always easy. After all, our pasts can be filled with both triumphs and tragedies, joys and sorrows.
But owning your story isn’t about denying the difficult parts. It’s about acknowledging them. It’s about accepting them as part of who you are.
When you can look back at your past without shame or fear, but instead with understanding and acceptance, that’s when you know you’re starting to take control of your narrative.
This doesn’t mean approving of everything that happened or all the choices you made. But it does mean accepting that they happened and that they played a role in shaping who you are today.
And why does this matter? Because it’s the first step towards healing, growth, and moving forward with a sense of purpose and self-awareness.
So if you find yourself starting to embrace your past, congratulations. You’re beginning to own your story.
2) You’re setting boundaries
There was a time in my life when I would say ‘yes’ to everything. Invited to a party I didn’t want to attend? I’d say yes. Asked to do a favor that I didn’t have the time or energy for? Again, yes. And it left me feeling drained, overwhelmed, and out of touch with my own needs.
But then, I started setting boundaries.
Setting boundaries is a clear sign that you’re owning your story. It means you’re recognizing your own needs and values, and you’re willing to protect them. It means you’re not afraid to say ‘no’ when something doesn’t align with your journey.
For me, it was a game-changer. Suddenly, I felt more in control of my life. I was making choices that felt right for me, rather than simply going along with what was expected or demanded of me.
And why does this matter? Because setting boundaries allows you to live authentically. It allows you to make choices that align with your story and take you closer to the person you want to be.
So if you’re finding the strength to set boundaries and stick to them, kudos to you. You’re well on your way to owning your story.
3) You’re learning to forgive
Forgiveness can be one of the most challenging aspects of owning your story. However, according to a study published in the Journal of Behavioral Medicine, forgiveness is associated with lower levels of stress and improved mental health.
This doesn’t mean you have to forget what happened or absolve others of their misdeeds. It means you’re choosing to let go of the anger and resentment that is holding you back.
When you begin to forgive, it’s a sign that you’re accepting your past, learning from it, and moving forward.
And why does this matter? Because holding on to resentment can be like carrying a heavy weight on your shoulders. But by forgiving, you’re choosing to set down that weight and free yourself to navigate your own path forward.
So if you find yourself starting to let go of past grudges and hurts, it’s a sign that you’re beginning to own your story.
4) You’re defining your values
Owning your story involves recognizing what truly matters to you. It’s about identifying your core values and making decisions that align with them.
Maybe you value honesty, and you’ve started to speak your truth even when it’s uncomfortable. Or perhaps you value growth, and you’re pushing yourself to learn new things and step out of your comfort zone.
Whatever your values are, they shape your actions, choices, and ultimately, your story.
And why does this matter? Because defining your values guides you towards living a life of authenticity. It acts as a compass, helping you navigate through life’s twists and turns with a sense of purpose and direction.
So if you’re starting to define what truly matters to you and living in alignment with those values, it’s a clear sign that you’re beginning to own your story.
5) You’re honoring your emotions
Feeling your feelings is a significant part of owning your story. It might sound simple, but it’s not always easy. We live in a society that often encourages us to suppress or ignore our emotions, especially the painful ones.
But when you start to honor your emotions, to allow yourself to feel them fully and without judgment, that’s when you truly begin to own your story.
This might mean allowing yourself to grieve losses deeply or allowing yourself to feel joy fully without diminishing it. It might mean acknowledging your anger, your sadness, or your fear as valid and valuable parts of your experience.
And why does this matter? Because our emotions are a crucial part of who we are. They guide us, inform us, and sometimes warn us. When we honor our emotions, we honor ourselves.
So if you’re beginning to respect and value your feelings, no matter what they are, that’s a powerful sign that you’re starting to own your story.
6) You’re not afraid of making mistakes
I’ve made plenty of mistakes in my life. Some small, some big. There was a time when I would dwell on these, letting them consume my thoughts and dictate my self-worth.
But I’ve learned that mistakes aren’t something to fear. They’re an essential part of the human experience and a valuable opportunity for growth and learning.
Owning your story means accepting that you’re not perfect. It means recognizing that you’ll make mistakes and that’s okay. It’s about understanding that every mistake is a step forward, not a step back.
And why does this matter? Because when we fear making mistakes, we hold ourselves back. We avoid taking risks or pushing our boundaries. But when we embrace our mistakes as learning opportunities, we open ourselves up to growth and new experiences.
So if you’re starting to see your mistakes as stepping stones rather than stumbling blocks, it’s a sure sign you’re beginning to own your story.
7) You’re pursuing your passions
When was the last time you did something purely because you love it? Not because it’s expected of you, or because it’s practical, but simply because it brings you joy?
Owning your story often involves reconnecting with your passions and making space for them in your life.
This could be anything from painting to hiking, playing an instrument, or writing. It’s about embracing what makes you feel alive and incorporating it into your life story.
And why does this matter? Because pursuing your passions adds color to your life. It enriches your story and makes it uniquely yours.
So if you find yourself making time for the things you love, that’s a beautiful sign that you’re beginning to own your story.
8) You’re living in the present
Owning your story isn’t just about embracing your past or planning for your future. It’s about fully living in the present moment.
It’s about not letting your past define you or your future intimidate you. It’s about recognizing that the present moment is where life happens.
When you fully engage with the present, you’re actively participating in your own story. You’re not just a bystander; you’re the main character, fully immersed and alive in each scene.
Living in the present means savoring the here and now, appreciating every experience, and making the most of each moment. And that, my friend, is truly owning your story.
Final thoughts: It’s all about embracing your journey
The quest to own your story is deeply personal and unique. It’s about acknowledging every facet of your life, the good and the bad, the joy and the pain, the victories and the defeats.
And why does it matter? Because when you own your story, you gain control over your life. Instead of being a passive observer, you become an active participant in your journey.
The American author Brené Brown once said, “Owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing that we will ever do.”
Indeed, owning your story requires courage. It requires vulnerability. But most importantly, it requires self-love and acceptance.
As you embark on this journey of owning your story, remember that it’s not a destination but a process. It’s about continuously evolving and growing as you navigate through life.
So if you see yourself in these 8 signs, take heart. You’re on the right path. You’re starting to own your story. And that’s something truly worth celebrating.
