There’s an art to being instantly likable, and a lot of it has nothing to do with what you’re saying.
It’s all about body language.
Body language is a silent orchestra that we all partake in, consciously or unconsciously. It’s not just about the words we speak but how we carry ourselves while speaking them.
According to psychology, certain body language tricks can heighten your likability factor. And who wouldn’t want to be instantly likable?
Let’s dive into these 10 proven body language tricks that can boost your likability quotient instantly. Trust me, it’s not as hard as you think.
1) The power of a genuine smile
Smiling is more than just a reaction to something funny or happy. It’s a universal sign of friendliness and warmth.
And yes, people can tell the difference between a genuine smile and a fake one. A genuine smile, also known as a Duchenne smile, involves not just your mouth but your eyes too.
When you smile genuinely, it triggers positive feelings in the people around you. It makes you seem approachable, friendly and, most importantly, likable.
Psychologists suggest that smiling can even be contagious. When you smile at someone, they’re more likely to smile back, initiating a cycle of positivity.
So next time you’re trying to win someone over, remember to flash your pearly whites. But remember, authenticity is key here. Forced smiles can be off-putting and may even make you seem insincere.
Smile genuinely and you’ll find people are naturally drawn to your positivity.
2) Mastering the art of eye contact
Eye contact is a powerful tool when it comes to connecting with others. It shows that you’re present, attentive, and interested in what they have to say.
I learned this lesson first-hand during a job interview. I was nervous and kept looking away, focusing on anything but the interviewer’s eyes. I didn’t get the job. Later, a friend who worked at the company told me that they thought I seemed disinterested and distracted.
Since then, I’ve consciously worked on maintaining eye contact during conversations. It wasn’t easy at first, but with practice, it became second nature. Now, whether I’m in a meeting, a social gathering or just having a one-on-one conversation, I make sure to maintain eye contact.
The result? People feel heard and valued when I talk to them. And that’s really helped me form deeper connections and become more likable.
3) Perfecting your handshake
A handshake is often the first point of physical contact between two people. It sets the tone for the interaction and can leave a lasting impression.
A study found that people with a firm handshake are more likely to make a good first impression . On the other hand, a weak or limp handshake can leave people feeling unsure or even negative about you.
How do you perfect your handshake? It should be firm but not crushing, and it should last about two to three seconds. Make sure to look the other person in the eye while shaking their hand – it adds to your sincerity and likability factor.
A good handshake is one of the quickest ways to establish a positive connection and can instantly make you more likable.
4) Utilizing open body language
Open body language is inviting. It says “I’m friendly and approachable” without uttering a single word.
When you stand or sit with your arms and legs uncrossed, you appear more welcoming. This openness signals your comfort and confidence in your surroundings and encourages others to interact with you.
Additionally, leaning in slightly when someone is speaking shows interest and engagement in what they’re saying. This can help foster a deeper connection and make you more likable to them.
On the flip side, closed body language, like crossing your arms or legs, can give off vibes of defensiveness or discomfort. This can create an invisible barrier that may discourage others from getting to know you.
Make a conscious effort to maintain open body language. It’s a simple yet effective way to become instantly more likable.
5) Mastering the art of mirroring
Mirroring is a subtle but powerful body language technique that involves replicating the actions of the person you’re interacting with. It could be as simple as adopting their posture, matching their gestures, or using similar speech patterns.
This technique, rooted deep in psychology, helps establish rapport with the other person. It sends a subliminal message that you’re on the same wavelength, fostering a sense of connection and likability.
But be careful not to go overboard with mirroring. You don’t want to come off as mimicking or mocking them. The key is subtlety. When you’re in a conversation, try to subtly mirror the other person’s body language and see how this simple trick can increase your likability.
6) Showing empathy through body language
Empathy is all about understanding and sharing the feelings of others. And believe it or not, it can be communicated through body language.
Nodding when someone shares something with you, for instance, shows that you understand and acknowledge their feelings or thoughts. Similarly, a comforting touch on the arm or a supportive pat on the back can convey empathy in a non-verbal way.
These small gestures can make a world of difference. They tell the other person that you’re there for them, that you care, making you instantly more likable.
We’ve all been through tough times and know how much a little understanding can mean.
7) Being present and attentive
In this digital age, where distractions are just a screen tap away, being fully present in a conversation has become something of a rarity. But this is exactly what makes it so valuable.
I used to be guilty of this too – checking my phone in the middle of conversations, or letting my mind wander to other things. But then I realized how it was affecting my relationships. People like to feel heard and valued, and by not giving them my full attention, I was sending the opposite message.
So I made a conscious decision to change. Now, when I’m in a conversation, I put away my phone and focus on the person in front of me. I listen actively, showing interest through my body language – nodding, maintaining eye contact, reacting appropriately.
The difference was almost immediate. People started responding more positively towards me. Being present and attentive not only made me more likable, but it also enriched my relationships in ways I hadn’t imagined.
8) Embracing silence
In a world that values constant chatter, silence can be unnerving. We often rush to fill in the quiet moments with words, fearing awkwardness.
But here’s the twist – silence can be incredibly powerful, especially when used wisely.
Pausing before responding or asking a question can show that you’re genuinely considering what the other person has said. This not only makes you seem thoughtful but also indicates respect for their opinions.
Using silence effectively can also give others the space to express themselves, making them feel valued and heard.
So, the next time you’re in a conversation, don’t fear the quiet moments. Embrace them and watch how they enhance your likability.
9) Adopting a confident posture
Confidence is attractive, and it’s not just about what you say but also how you carry yourself.
A confident posture involves standing or sitting up straight, keeping your head held high, and your shoulders rolled back. This posture conveys self-assuredness, making you appear more reliable and trust-worthy.
Interestingly, adopting a confident posture doesn’t just influence how others perceive you, but it can also impact how you feel about yourself. Research suggests that maintaining a positive posture can actually boost your self-esteem and mood!
Whether you’re walking into a meeting room or attending a social event, remember to carry yourself with confidence. It’s a surefire way to enhance your likability.
10) Being authentic
At the end of the day, nothing beats authenticity. You can master all the body language tricks in the world, but if you’re not being yourself, people will pick up on it.
Authenticity involves being comfortable with who you are and expressing your true feelings and thoughts. When you’re authentic, you come across as genuine and relatable, making you instantly more likable.
Don’t be afraid to let your true self shine through. It’s the most likable thing about you!