Before I discovered ikigai, I thought feeling uninspired was just part of growing older.
In my 30s, I was constantly chasing something—promotions, achievements, recognition. But no matter how much I accomplished, fulfillment always seemed just out of reach.
I assumed slowing down in my 70s would mean settling for a life that felt smaller. Less excitement, fewer ambitions, and a quiet acceptance that my most vibrant years were behind me.
Then I learned about ikigai, the Japanese philosophy of finding purpose in everyday life. And to my surprise, instead of fading into the background of my own story, I started feeling more alive than ever.
What changed? It wasn’t a sudden career shift or a drastic lifestyle overhaul. It was something much simpler—and far more powerful.
How I found purpose in the small moments
At first, I thought ikigai meant finding one grand passion—some singular purpose that would redefine my life. But the more I explored the concept, the more I realized it wasn’t about chasing something bigger. It was about appreciating what was already there.
I started paying attention to the small things that brought me joy. Morning walks in the crisp air. Conversations with old friends. The satisfaction of learning something new, just for the sake of it.
Instead of focusing on what I should be doing, I asked myself what made me feel engaged and present. I found meaning in mentoring younger colleagues, in writing letters by hand, in tending to my garden with care instead of rushing through it like a chore.
The more I leaned into these everyday moments, the more alive I felt. Not because I had discovered some secret formula, but because I had stopped searching for fulfillment in the wrong places.
Yet for years, I had believed something entirely different about purpose—an idea that held me back for far too long.
Why I stopped searching for a single, life-defining purpose
For most of my life, I believed purpose had to be something big. A career that changed the world. A lifelong passion that gave my days meaning.
If I didn’t have that, I assumed I was missing something—that I just hadn’t figured it out yet. So I kept searching, convinced that one day, I’d finally land on the thing that would make everything click into place.
But in my 70s, I realized ikigai wasn’t about finding one grand mission. It was about embracing the small, meaningful moments that were already part of my life.
I had spent decades chasing something distant when fulfillment had been right in front of me all along. And once I let go of the pressure to define my purpose in one sweeping statement, I finally felt free.
Learning to slow down and pay attention
The biggest shift I made was learning to slow down. Instead of constantly looking ahead to the next big goal, I started paying attention to what was happening right now.
I asked myself simple questions: What moments in my day make me feel content? When do I feel most engaged? What small actions bring me joy?
Then, I did more of those things. I took my morning coffee outside instead of rushing through it. I had longer conversations with friends instead of treating them like check-ins. I gave myself permission to enjoy hobbies—without needing them to be productive or impressive.
The more present I became, the more meaningful my life felt. Purpose wasn’t something I needed to find—it was something I needed to notice.
If you’ve been searching for a bigger answer, maybe it’s time to stop looking so far ahead.
Living on your own terms
For most of my life, I let external expectations shape my idea of purpose. Success meant achievement. Fulfillment meant finding one passion. Slowing down felt like falling behind.
But when I started questioning those beliefs, I realized they weren’t truly mine. They were ideas I had absorbed—from society, from work culture, from the people around me.
Letting go of those expectations gave me the freedom to redefine purpose on my own terms. And that shift wasn’t just about ikigai—it was about how I approached everything in my life.
Here’s what I’ve learned:
- Purpose isn’t something you find—it’s something you create from what’s already around you.
- Slowing down doesn’t mean doing less; it means paying attention to what truly matters.
- You don’t need one big mission to have a meaningful life—small moments of joy are just as valuable.
- Questioning what you’ve been taught about success and fulfillment can open doors you didn’t even know existed.
If you’ve been feeling stuck, maybe it’s not because you’re lost—but because you’re following a definition of purpose that was never meant for you.
When you start thinking for yourself and taking responsibility for shaping your own path, everything changes. You stop searching and start living.
